We were heading downstream, to what used to be the frozen North. It was probably still North, but I didn't have a compass and Lux told me they didn't work anymore.

And it wasn't frozen. Whatever Sliceday had done to Canada had been thoroughly disruptive to the ecosystem. It was all tropics, all the time. Pink, weird-looking dolphins followed us. I remembered freshwater dolphins in the Amazon; how'd they get here? And where was the fresh water coming from if there weren't any snow-capped mountains to feed a river at all?

I asked Lux about it. "No clue," she said. "Maybe someone online can tell you, but I can't link to them. I'm not an AI anymore; I'm just an unbearably hot woman."

I laughed. She could have been a movie star with that delivery. Todd turned scarlet and looked away.

"I want to get you into a place where we can load you into uh…cyberspace again."

"It's called cyberspace by some, Owen. Mostly really old people, but it works. Everyone else calls it the QRNI."

"What's it stand for?"

"Don't remember. Quantum Runic something. It's what you get if you have quantum computers juiced up with Runes. And…I'm doing okay at the moment, but I really appreciate you thinking about me and what I need."

It was all I thought about. Lux was in her current state due to my foolishness. Anything that happened to her was my fault. I was just glad she seemed to be having a fun camping trip instead of involuntary stardom on the Human Dark QRNI.

"Is this the plan?" Todd grumped. "To just go down the river to the ocean?"

"It's a fine plan," Lux said. "We'll find some people, an internet connection, maybe even a city. We'll be able to disappear. You'll be able to find your loving community of bigots, everyone's happy."

He scowled. "Not bigots."

"What are they then, Preston Covenant?" She'd shed a little of her amiability. A little malice in there, maybe even some Mean Girl. Justified, in my opinion. "Who else you think hides in the forest hatching plots against a multiracial utopia?"

Todd sighed. "They call themselves Pro-Human Patriots."

I raised a hand.

"Yes, Owen."

"Patriotic? Toward what? Is there still a United States besides the President?"

"Definitely! It still exists. People just don't … you know, pay taxes to it."

"Sounds like the Confederacy," Lux said.

"I have no idea what that is," Todd said, jabbing a triumphant finger in her face.

Lux smiled, a little more kindly. "Oh, Todd."

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Todd looked confused, then returned to sulking.

We passed things that I never expected to see in Canada, I can tell you that.

An entire forest of what must have been Sequoia trees, but bigger and rounder. Like skyscrapers. They were surrounded by floating multicolored gemlike balloons of something. Lux told me they were people, but very shy around Humans. Or viciously racist, one or the other. There was a famous one online, but she'd forgotten his name. He was an asshole.

We slid past that town-of-trees, which was fine by me. I suspected a living city of that sort had defenses against guys like us. And people who were fragile balloons were likely quite dangerous to intruders.

A long stretch of very wide river. It was slow, tranquil, very clear. We could see the bottom, far down there past the improbably huge fish parked motionless as we drifted past.

A single vast eye opened in the river mud, spreading silt in huge clouds. A white nictating membrane like a glacier slid rapidly out of the way, and a startlingly green eye the size of a baseball field inspected us, its horizontal pupil contracting. As we watched, frozen, the eyelid closed again, its river plants shuddering back into place.

The one that really sticks with me, though? It was a little island in the middle of the river, covered with palm trees that blew desperately in an unfelt, nonexistent wind. The island was dark; no sun reached it through unseen clouds, and sourceless lightning flashes occasionally strobed, illuminating it.

In the center of the stormy island (there was no storm) was a little wooden shack. Its door blew open and closed, causing the distant snap-snap of it to reach us all the way out here. A single window with a warm yellow glow inside. A shadow moving past it.

It was scarier than that big eye. We scooted silently past and I felt faint with relief.

We slept that night in the boat, rather than strike camp. I was frankly nervous about this magic jungle, and the river had treated us well so far.

Todd snored. Lux snored too, but was better at it. I was taking the first watch. I tended to have nightmares about Camp Covenant anyway.

The night sky wasn't full of constellations I knew. Some seemed right, such as the Big Dipper. Others were a mess. And there was a big green nebula, one that would flicker and slowly, slowly change to indigo. Then back to green.

I liked this. I loved this whole crazy place. It hit me like a lightning bolt: I enjoyed something!

Look, when you get used to being a sourpuss, you really notice when something breaks through. In my case it was being taken from my home planet, time period, whatever…and plopped down here.

It hadn't been pleasant, not really. But it was interesting. Open-ended. And I was on a stolen Costco raft with a beautiful girl and a scumbag racism influencer. There were possibilities, that's what I'm trying to convey here. Earth, pre-slice? Not so much.

here

"What is that?" I said aloud. "Who's saying that?"

Snork, went Lux. She sat up. Pretty girl, mussed. "We there yet?"

"The coast? No, go back to bed, I'll bug you when it's your turn."

"Yeah." She rolled on her side. Kept talking, mumbling in a half-asleep way. "You have spring break where you're from?"

"Oh yes."

"Ever go do it? Drugs, loose sex, alcohol, murdering policemen?"

"None of that, not even murdering policemen."

"I'm on spring break. I'm gonna go wild while I'm out here. Gonna start some shit before I leave this body. You cool?"

"I'm cool, Lux. You show 'em."

"Start some shit with a policemen." She drifted off again.

Or so I'd thought. "I do know," she said. Sounding just as sleepy, but more serious. "I know, okay? I know what they were gonna do."

I swallowed. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"Not your fault. You're just an idiot who gets mad easy. Just as bigoted as this chump in your own way."

"That's true."

She started snoring again. I didn't wake either of them, just kept watch.

So I was ready when the sunrise came, and the water was vibrating beneath the boat. The river was now so wide and shallow it could have been an inland sea. There was a mass of moving objects in it. Big ones. It was a city, one unlike anything I'd ever seen.

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