Chapter 609: Transformation
“Master, master, hurry and go, there’s no time to lose, you won’t get another opportunity!”
“What do you want me to do?”
“Do you even need to ask? I guess even the wisest can have momentary lapses in judgment, of course, it’s to confess! While the class leader is an unstable state of mind, hurry and infiltrate! There’s even Gong CaiCai acting as a witness, so it would be even more effective!”
“Confess my ass, do you not hear her saying bad things about me?”
I threw the flattened beer can directly towards Eunuch Cao’s head. My emotions were also in disarray and I couldn’t care about the environment anymore.
Eunuch Cao shrank back and the beer can skimmed by him. He still had a wretched smile on his face and said:
“Master, why don’t you understand? Girls like the class leader always says no, but their bodies are always honest.”
Seeing me glare at him, he quickly changed his statement, “Anyway, according to my years of experience in H-games, if you go out and give the class leader a hug in front of Gong CaiCai, then explain the misunderstanding and say a few cheesy lines, she will fall right into your hands.”
“Huh, how did you know the class leader misunderstood?” It’s not like Eunuch Cao was there when I was rubbing my zipper back and forth on Xiao Qin.
“I don’t, but in order to conquer the class leader, you have to make it a misunderstanding even if it wasn’t.”
“You’re saying it as if I really want to conquer the class leader…”
Eunuch Cao rolled his wily eyes, “Do you not? Someone who’s usually as independent and majestic as the class leader will definitely be cute and helpless after being conquered by master. Plus in the future the Justice Devil will be tossing about in bed under you… just thinking about it, ikuuuu….”
Can you stop saying Japanese female AV lines with a red face? I haven’t even thought that far ahead yet. Although the Metal-blooded Lone Wolf has been wrongly accused by the Justice Devil many times, I never thought about getting my revenge that way!
“Who’s there? Who’s hiding in the bushes?”
Despite all the noise outside, the class leader still noticed the two of us.
She immediately looked alertly towards us. Obama rushed forward a few steps, stretching the leash in the class leader’s hand to its max length.
She wasn’t wearing a uniform, but she was basically a policewoman with a police dog.
Obama seemed to be more obedient with the class leader than he was with Ai Mi. It looks like it wasn’t a waste for the class leader reading the dog breeding manual.
“Hurry up and come out or I’ll sic the dog on you.”
The class leader immediately regained her usual composure and severeness when there was an unknown person around. She threatened us by loosening the leash that was wrapped around her hand.
Gong CaiCai hid behind the class leader when she heard there was someone in the bushes.
“It’s, it’s a tiger, right? It’s a tiger coming to eat me.”
Gong CaiCai still remembered what Xiong YaoYue said when she was trying to scare her.
Obama suddenly stopped barking.
Obama stopped barking when he heard it might be a tiger.
So he got scared after he heard it’s a tiger? Not only did he stop barking, he even hid behind the class leader like Gong CaiCai. Do you want the class leader to use her body to block you from the tiger?
The class leader wasn’t Loud Mouth, so there wasn’t a lot of room behind her body. Obama thought Gong CaiCai was in the way, so he barked a few times and scared her away.
Thus the Husky monopolized the area behind the class leader. He only poked his head out by the class leader’s leg to see if there actually was a tiger or not.
“Un… un… un…” Gong CaiCai, who had no place to hide, trembled as she kept repeating a word.
“Uncle… uncle…”
“Uncle… uncle… save me!”
Gong CaiCai shouted as loud as she could.
But because she was too scared, it wasn’t even louder than the sound of moving water.
So she was calling for help. If you’re scared to the point where you can’t even properly call for help, then if bad guys kidnap you, they don’t even have to cover your mouth.
“Don’t be scared, there are no tigers here.” The class leader said calmly. It wasn’t unexpected to have Gong CaiCai stiffen up from fright, but she never expected a large dog like Obama to hide behind her.
“Xiao Ba.” the class leader gave Obama her own nickname, “Don’t be a disgrace to huskies, use your nose and you will know if there’s a tiger in there. If you act a bit more brave, I’ll feed you beef when we get back…”
I don’t think you can really bring any more disgrace to a dumb breed like huskies. And are you sure Obama will understand if you say such a long sentence?
Damn, he actually understood it! Not only does he understand the word ‘tiger’, he could actually understand such a long sentence! He only started sniffing the air after the class leader’s reminder. He stood right beside the class leader again while acting cocky.
What are you getting cocky for when you forgot you had the ability to smell? And did you really get persuaded by a piece of beef?
I thought if I didn’t come out, the class leader might raise the stakes (like giving Obama a lamb leg). If Obama was blinded by greed and rushed into the bushes and started biting randomly, then Eunuch Cao and I are both screwed.
“Class leader, don’t shoot, it’s me.”
I stuck my head out of the bushes, I don’t know why I misspoke and said ‘don’t shoot’ instead of ‘don’t sic the dog’.
The class leader’s face instantly turned red. She bit her lips and stared daggers at me.
“When… when did you hide in there.”
She finally asked with a calm expression, but she was probably anxiously waiting for my response.
“Ah… it’s not a tiger…” Gong CaiCai’s relaxed and her legs went limp, then she sat down by the river bank.
If I said I was there from the beginning and heard their conversation, I wouldn’t seem like a gentleman and it would make the class leader feel awkward.
So I coughed while pointing behind me to Eunuch Cao.
“I just came over cause Eunuch Cao wanted to take a shit. He was afraid there would be snakes, so he begged me to come with him. Look, he didn’t take off his pants yet.”
The class leader showed an expression of disgust. It was natural since which girl will want to see boys (especially Eunuch Cao) take a poop.
I kicked at Eunuch Cao, “Hurry up and take off your pants, didn’t you just say it was coming out?”
Eunuch Cao might have been afraid of the class leader catching him with his camera, so he didn’t hesitate and instantly pulled down his pants.
“Uhhhh…. unnnnn….. ummmm.”
Eunuch Cao made nasally sounds like he was constipated.
The class leader quickly averted her gaze and said angrily, “Didn’t we pass a public washroom earlier? It might be a bit old, but it’s a only a couple minutes walk from here. You guys should have went there!”
“Eunuch Cao couldn’t hold it in anymore.” I said, “And isn’t poop a pile of natural fertilizer for the trees?”
“To be honest, I feel like Eunuch Cao himself is a pile of natural fertilizer and should be buried under the tree.”
The class leader covered her nose and walked away with Obama, but Obama seemed very interested.
I guess dogs can’t help but want to eat shit?
She helped up Gong CaiCai and went back to camp.
But when leaving, she looked at the expression on my face, as if to check whether or not I was lying.
I purposely didn’t look towards the class leader. I pretended it was stinky while fanning under my nose.
The class leader looked back every three steps and left with deep suspicions.
I breathed out in relief, but realized something was actually stinking up my nose.
Eunuch Cao raised his head and said to me: “Master, can you help me bring some tissues?”
Damn, who told you to actually poop here?
“It’s not my fault. I already ate a lot and you told me to squat down. Once I took off my pants, I felt it coming out, what could I do?”
“I don’t have tissues, use some leaves.”
After ditching Eunuch Cao and returning to the camp, I saw that the class leader kept her promise and was feeding Obama grilled beef.
Her expression appeared to be cheerful, but her eyes were very lonely. Whenever we accidentally made eye contact, she immediately twisted away and carried a look of resentment.
As I looked at Xiong YaoYue thoughtlessly eating, I don’t think it’s a good idea to keep letting the class leader misunderstand. Let’s leave whether Xiao Qin is a girlfriend or a sister aside for the time being. I should first explain to the class leader that Xiong YaoTue and I are just pals.
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