"You guys are coming with me to meet Caitlin's dad, right?" Ralph asked.

Dave shook his head, "Bro, I'm trying to keep my distance from the Giovannis, Caitlin included."

"Whaa...? Bro, I feel like there's something you're not telling me here."

Zoe interrupted, "I'm not coming either. There's really nothing to worry about, Ralph. The Mafia doesn't order hits on people unless you mess with their business or kill a Made guy. Usually."

"Mafia? Hits?!" Ralph gave them the stink-eye, "Caitlin is mobbed up? Why didn't you tell me? You assholes."

Zoe shook her head sadly, her voice saccharine-sweet as she said, "Oh, Ralphy, I tried to, really I did. But you weren't interested. Your exact words were 'Don't know, don't care'."

Ralph looked from Zoe to Dave and back, "You are sick, twisted and evil individuals. I'm cutting you both out of my will."

He ignored the twin expressions of comically-exaggerated shock on their faces.

"I guess I need to get going. Caitlin said I need to be there at noon," Ralph said.

"Want a lift?" Zoe grinned at him.

"Nope! I'll take a cab. Stuck in a room with a mafia boss is better than being turned to red jelly in a car accident."

Zoe laughed and punched his arm, "Scaredy cat! You should go change into something nice before you go to meet your future father-in-law."

"I'm not going to propose. It's just a talk. Later, guys," Ralph waved as he sauntered off to hail a cab.

"Cya, bro."

"Buh-byeee, Ralphie."

***

.

Entering his hotel room that evening Dave checked the time and smiled. The Conquest servers were about to come back online in just a few minutes. Perfect.

Dave got into the Conquest capsule and hit the log-in as soon as the countdown reached zero.

He appeared in the Undead City and immediately received a string of notifications.

***

Greetings Kis'Shtiengbrah.

Conquest is now running Service Pack 3.0 and will be different from your previous experiences.

For details about the changes and updates, please go to the Conquest-Wiki.

May you have Good-Game in Conquest!

***

He swiped the greeting away and got the next notification in the stack.

***

All of your avatar's Attribute Points have been refunded.

You can respecialize your avatar or keep the same character build.

Warning! Service Pack 3.0 has changed game features and gameplay significantly!

***

Your title (I Know It All) has been removed from the game.

You will no longer benefit from the 5% increase to all attributes the title gave. But you will be refunded the bonus 100 points per attribute the title granted.

***

'WTF?! That's complete bullshit! I'm going to put in a complaint.'

***

Health Points have been changed to Hit Points.

***

You have Contribution Points!

You have: 220,000 CP (refunded)

***

For reviving the Undead legion you are awarded: 5,000,000 CP.

***

Dungeon Raider

You can sense dungeon cores and can capture cores to take control of the dungeon. If you control a dungeon core you can transform dungeon into an Undead Dungeon.

You receive a daily tithe of CP from dungeons you have transformed (for details select a dungeon from the list below).

The following transformed dungeons under your control have reopened:

Desolate Temple

Ice Palace Dungeon

Skeletal Soul Eater Dungeon

Mustakrakish's Desert Palace

***

Ownership of your Settlement in the Underworld Dead Realm has been restored to you.

***

"Yeah! I'm back, baby!" Dave punched a fist in the air then rubbed his hands over each other in Greedy Overlord glee, cackling.

***

As a member of the Undead race, you are able to access the Underworld at your discretion.

The Dead Realm, Red Fortress, and Undead Frontier teleport gate coordinates have been restored to your logs.

***

Undead Management options have been unlocked.

You can revive your undead and other units from the Respawners in your Settlement.

***

Finally the last notification.

***

A divine being of Conquest has issued a Call for you.

You will be transported to the deity:

In 2 seconds

***

'Two seconds? Nooo, I haven't respec-'

The timer reached zero and Dave was teleported from the Dead Realm without further notice, protest was unheeded.

He appeared in an empty nightclub, the industrial fluorescent lighting revealed its age and neglect in too much detail. Against one wall was a rundown stage with a drum set, mike and speakers on it. A bar stretched the length of the opposite wall, too few decrepit stools scattered at irregular intervals in front of it.

"Way to shove 10 pounds of shit into a 5-pound bag, genius." The god of undeath said from behind the bar, wiping a glass with a dirty bar towel.

"What are you going on about?" Dave tried to quell the annoyance he felt as soon as he saw the punk god.

"I said: revive the greater undead with the Death Heart. But noooooooooo, you had to get clever and revive a Monarch Tier Undead with dime-store magic. Dumbass."

"How was I supposed to know he'd turn into whatever that was? You're his god, so fix him."

Nick spread his arms out, "Do I look like a god that does miracles? The king was brought back without his mind or soul. Consider yourself lucky the Death Heart fixed what it did and he only lost some memories. I really wanna know, is it just electric fences, or do you go around pissing on bonfires to put them out too?"

"Whatever, Nick. If you can't bring back the king's memory then what the fuck do you want? You didn't bring me here for this conversation, no matter how scintillating it is."

"You're going on a vision-quest," the punk-god grinned at Dave

"A quest to see something? Like what?" Dave was honestly puzzled.

Nick sighed and shook his head, muttering something about youth and shallowness.

"I'm sending you on your final Legacy Quest," he tried again.

"Oh, okay. You coulda just said that first. Gimme a minute I need to re-spec," Dave pulled up his character sheet and started running calculations in his head.

"Pointless," the punk-god muttered and waved a hand.

A vortex materialized under the draugr's feet and sucked him in, the last thing he heard was the Nick's gleeful, "Guh-byeee!"

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