"What the actual fuck does it mean my assassin?! Play, what the fuck?"
Want me to lookup what assassin means?
"Goddamnit, you know what I mean. Is it a player? Or something else?" Great, he had to worry about a serial killer back home on Earth, and now that possible serial killer right here in his safe space away from Earth. "What exactly does 'selecting a shape' mean?"
Something about an infiltrator upgrade? Wade's head was swimming.
Might be a shapeshifter that's after you? Maybe some mafia mini-game? Oh that'd be real devious. Now you have to be paranoid about everyone.
Apparently, it might not be a serial killer, it might just be an eldritch abomination instead. "Great. Love that. Can I have any actual advice I could use?"
Ask Eri for a blood sample and boil it. If it jumps, you know he's the assassin.
Wade looked at the skeleton. The skeleton that lacked any living flesh or blood. Then looked slowly back at his phone.
"Play."
Michael.
The skeleton in question clicked his jaw once. Then extended a finger, and jabbed it a few times at Wade.
Wade sensed betrayal coming. "I don't even know what you're implying here Eri."
no,no, he's got a point here Michael, you should listen to him.
"And… what point would that be?" He asked, finally taking off the lifevest. It looked so comically out of place here, miles away from any real water.
Should do the blood test on you first, in case *you're* the assassin. Subvert the plot twist before it happens lmao
Wade stared at the text for a moment, then rolled his eyes. "Oh my fucking god. Play. This is serious." He turned his glare at Eri. "You too. Don't encourage the NEETess."
The backpack was equally dropped down, all the gear and equipment rattling inside. Leon's longsword was left tied to the side, waiting to reunite with it's true owner.
You got two options imo:
Rat out and keep running away
You set a trap and try to fight it
"You want me to pick a fight with the assassin that's supposed to be a challenge mode difficulty? Play, I get the feeling that this thing is tailor-built to kick my ass."
I didn't say you needed to kill it with the trap. Your water mastery cheats lets you run super fast. Add some blackrot to that, and you could probably break a few speed records. Figure out what it is and what it can do, and then kite it to death. You got the range, you got the zappy bullets, and you got the speed. good enough tools to make it work against anything
Wade took a moment to think through his options. Play wasn't wrong about her plan, but it would require getting blackrot in his legs and he didn't want to get stuck down here. "We got a quest to straight up get out of hell, and the System means out the other side of the mithril sea. And also find that alchemy lab on the floating city thing, which is probably also on the other side of the sea. Can't cross it with rot in my legs."
It's possible you'd get more overall coins fighting the assassin off and farming around here picking fights, idk. Could also be good info on if questchains you buy from the store disappear if you don't get them done in one round, that's important enough to learn for the price of a coin.
"Alright." He took a breath. "I'll aim to setup something that can slow down the assassin if it comes after us, and also try to get the fuck out of here. That's a good middle ground that'll still let me get out of this place."
Play, of course, started complaining right away.
(눈_눈) come on Michael, you're killing me here. Soooooo boring and safe, you really gonna give up on such a perfect farming spot? When are you gonna get this sort of combination again? Electric bullets and the ability to kite anything out here. It's like blackrot kryptonite, you better abuse this or else I'm going to get real mad fr frヽ( `д´*)ノ
Wade looked up, far above the mithril clouds. Scaling the mountain was the only way out of here. But what happens if that assassin thing attacked him while he was scaling?
Assuming he even could climb safely. A single bug bite from a blackrotten critter hiding in a rock over there would end his plans instantly. Problem was that he still had that limp, and that was some heavy ass gear he'd need to lug all the way up.
Eri tapped his shoulder, then pointed at the gear, and then over to his back. As in he could probably carry the gear himself up there, remove a lot of the load off Wade.
"Right, good call." Wade said. "Man, come to think of it, I really lucked out with that scroll. How many times have you saved my ass so far in the last ten minutes?"
The skeleton held a hand up, then started counting down a few fingers. Enough times I deserve a raise, boss.
Wade froze, thinking hard. There had to be something else that he could give Eri besides a raise. First thought was an employee pizza party, except skeletons don't eat, and Wade had to be smarter than his soon-to-be corporate competition. He needed to come up with better ideas than free pizza in the break room.
His head flashed through all the options and everything he knew about the skeleton.
Eri loved earth. And the image of him knocking a small little tune on Jason's door floated to mind.
That'll do.
Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.
"Tell you what, buddy. How about we get you a full on music instrument when we come back home?"
It hit a nerve. The skeleton turned his skull directly at Wade, curious.
Wade doubled down.
"Oh yeah, there's tons out there. Drums, guitar, piano, violines, trumpets." He paused. "Wait, no, you probably won't do well with the trumpets. Shame, think you probably would have been a trumpet player if you'd been born on Earth."
The skull tilted to the side. Wade had his undivided attention now.
"How about when we come back to Earth, you take some well deserved rest and relaxation and I show you all about the wonderful world of human music innovations and youtube song playlists? Sound good?"
The skeleton gave him thumbs up before hefting the backpack with ease.
"Good talk, great deal." Wade said, nodding along happily.
Crisis averted! Wade was an excellent CEO.
Feral noise echoed through the valley, followed by something that sounded like a buzzsaw having an argument with a blender. Or two Chihuahuas running into each other. Mostly the latter as Wade listened, pressed up against the rock wall where he'd panic dove.
Eri clicked a jaw, then creeped over to the side of the wall, scouting.
This wasn't an isolated event either. As Wade found out, the entire valley here was just filled with noise of fights, chases, and other chaos.
It was so different compared to the Nathir city. Over there, he could hear a pin drop most of the time. Only things that made sound were the golems stomping around.
Maybe it was a sort of Darwinism. The blackrot critters that made too much sound or got involved with golems didn't survive. And those that managed to escape were the quiet ones. Thinking about it more, Wade realized the wolves had tried to avoid Eri, and dive after him. Blackrot can't eat skeletons or golems. Anytime they have to fight either of those two, it's all risk, zero reward. Blackrot had shown a surprising amount of intelligence for an animal. Wade could see them come to the conclusion that staying quiet is the better choice in the Nathir cities. But down here in hell? It's a free-for-all. He had to get out before something bit him.
"Are we clear to make a break for the mountain?" Wade asked.
The phone buzzed.
୧((#Φ益Φ#))୨
Eri clicked his jaw and made a few motions, he was ready to go.
There wasn't anything visible out there right now; it's just that the sound of fighting echoed across the valleys, so maybe he could make it?
It was like he tempted Murphy's Law. Because at that moment, the valley went completely quiet. It's only then that Wade realized just how much of the sound around him was actually insects. Howling and fighting just stood out more.
By the bushes nearby, Wade saw a blackrotten rabbit rush out. The little critter sprinted as fast as it could away from the ruins, past Wade and Eri, without even bothering to avoid them.
There was something worse coming.
Then came the sounds of sniffing, twigs snapping and mud getting squashed under footsteps.
Eri took a peek over the crumbled-up wall.
"What do you see?" Wade whispered.
Big. Horns. Sniffing around. Peek only if you stay hidden.
His charades were oddly easy to understand.
Wade took a deep breath, then slowly peeked over the wall.
It was a demon - an honest-to-God demon. Just like the ones in a fishing boat, except completely covered in black rot. Eri was right about the horns, two massive ones sprouted from its head, curling around.
Reminded him of a minotaur, except absolutely feral, stomping around, sniffing. The only thing that made it look somewhat civilized was that it carried a massive longsword in its right hand.
Identify.
Level 59 Blackrotten Greater Infernal Essence - 100%
Well, maybe that's why the System considered this location to be extreme difficulty. Least it wasn't level one hundred twenty fuck-you.
"Why the fuck is it even here?" Wade hissed, "Why does the universe keep pissing all over me??"
A moment later, Wade realized why it was here.
Food. Easy to eat, pre-tenderized and plated food: The wolf carcasses.
It seemed to finally spot those, because it stopped sniffing the air, eyes turning directly at his target, and then started running at a full sprint, crashing into the ground next to them, hand digging down into the mud to righten its overshoot. It started eating even before it stopped moving, like a glutton, crushing bone and everything. The blackrot mist around it expanded slightly, pulsating, as if the body mass had increased slightly.
"Think we can sneak by him?"
The skeleton started clicking his jaw over and over.
"Yeah, figures." Wade muttered, sighing.
Unfortunately, it was between them and the mountain. Which means Wade had very few options, and one of those options was to sit here and wait for the beast to move away. Either that or throw a granola bar far off. Probably wouldn't work, given Wade's luck. "All right, waiting it is."
It didn't take the monster long to finish its meal. And, unfortunately, instead of walking away, it started sniffing at the ground again. For a final time, the universe once more gave Wade a middle finger.
New Personal quest: Challenge Gauntlet - An enemy forty levels or higher above you is hunting you down. Evade or defeat your hunter. Reward: One storefront coin if your pursuer is eliminated.
"Ah, fuck, it's after us Eri." Wade hissed.
Eri clicked his jaw once. Oh it's definitely after us now. You really thought it wouldn't?
"I took a shower, how is that thing sniffing me out? This is bullshit!" And then Wade saw it. It wasn't sniffing. It was tracking. Their footprints.
It was carrying a long sword in hand and tracking footprints. This thing was smart.
Which means it was going to find them eventually. Wade got to work already preparing for the fight.
What did they know so far about this thing? It's shown signs of intelligence and it's a higher level than Eri was. Which means if Eri had to fight him one-on-one, the skeleton would lose. That meant Wade and everything he's got will be the deciding factor. If he can support Eri correctly, that's going to be the difference between win or loss here.
He made sure the Glock had a fresh magazine with a round chambered. He had plenty of small rocks here to trigger his dodge boon, and hell, he had some further testing to do anyhow. What else could he do to prep?
Everything in this valley went quiet on this thing showing up. Given what he'd learned about Blackrot and its ability to adapt to the environment, that meant every other creature here had survived by staying away from demons like this. Like that rabbit made a run for it right past them.
If the rabbit was smart enough to do that, other beasts would.
Which probably meant that their fight is going to remain a one-on-one fight. Predators were likely to stay away. Or they might show up after the fight, looking for a quick meal if the winner looked weak enough to take on.
So it wasn't enough to just win - they had to win in a way that made them look as if they can still take on more.
Eri clicked his jaw a few times, cracking his neck, setting the backpack down. No need to bring it to the fight, then turned and gave a few hand signs, including the Nathir one for battle.
It was apparently some kind of tradition. Or the skeleton was just having a pre-fight-for-your-life giggle. But Wade could understand what Eri was asking him to do next.
"Uh, no way. I wouldn't know how to do a motivational speech if my life depended on it."
Eri clicked a jaw.
"I know, I know." Wade hissed. "I realized the irony right after I said that, thank you."
Eri clicked his jaw a second time, insisting.
Wade sighed. "Fine, fine! Uhhh." He closed his eyes, thinking. "It'll be tough, but it's not Lapushka. If we managed to beat that thing, we can beat this thing. Probably. We've got boons and more equipment than god know what to do with. We got this. We can do this."
Eri thumped his ribcage rapidly, getting riled up. Yeah, that's more like it, boss. Let's do this. Let's cut its head off.
The more Wade rambled on, the more he actually started to believe it, especially with the skeleton acting more like a coked up bloodthirsty cheerleader just eating up every word and vibrating harder all the while.
"You know what? Why not now?" He hissed out to himself, psyching himself up too. "No one lives forever. Right? We're going to wipe this asshole off the face of the earth."
He had planned on doing some testing with his boon combo here, why not right out the gate at the start of the round? He'd need to do this eventually, why not not?
The skeleton brought out his greatsword, gave Wade a quick hand salute, and then lowered himself down, as if a sprinter ready to take off the runway.
He was ready. Was Wade?
The answer was hell no he wasn't. But… "Fuck it, let's ball."
Wade reached for his bandolier and unhooked a grenade.
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