There isn't even time for the door to close behind us before the challenge in front of us bellows its battle cry, incensed at us invading its territory.

[Kobold Chieftain – Level 8]

Only twice my level… not too bad, I can handle this.

…I can definitely handle this…?

Right?

I stay front and center to try to hold their attention while Gattas' support magic starts to bolster my endurance and shout, "Hey ugly, right here!" for dramatic effect.

Shaya clearly wants to circle. I can feel her creep slightly to one side as the four kobold guards start defensively toward me, wooden shields and simple spears at the ready, but she's wisely staying at least close enough that I can intercept a charge should they make one.

Good. I can work with this.

[Kobold (Lesser) Slain. 260 experience has been awarded.]

…Especially when Covetous Wanderer can cut through their flimsy shields and armor like tissue paper!

With an unexpected grin the kobold chieftain… starts chanting.

A mage?

A mage!

"Look out!" I shout as a narrow gout of flame shoots past me, grazing my shield and making me stumble. I'm fortunately its only target, I'm not sure any of the backliners that make up all the rest of my party would have survived a direct hit from that. Unfortunately it's a bit too quick on its feet for my follow-up shot to hit, instead pockmarking the stone tile behind it as it rapidly repositions behind its remaining retinue.

What it's not too quick for is the volley of ice Nebora unleashes, expertly leading it in an arc causing more of the sharp spikes to hit than miss, impaling and ending the second of the guards. The boss monster screeches in pain but catches itself on its staff before its face can meet the floor, leaving it vulnerable to a fatal arrow in the neck.

[Kobold (Lesser) Chieftain Slain – 440 experience has been awarded.]

…And down it goes, leaving only the two remaining guards, one of which is already jabbing rapidly at my shield while the other attempts to flank me. I have a few more System messages but I ignore them for now.

All appears to be going well until the flanking guard suddenly breaks off, running to engage the now-exposed archer. It catches her off guard enough that her next shot completely misses, embedding itself into a crack in the far wall.

Oh no.

No, no no…

No!

I quickly show the kobold in front of me a feint to the left, just enough to catch it off guard before I take off to the right after its remaining companion. Will I make it in time?

I don't know if I can…!

Clearly it hears me coming, because it risks a glance over its shoulder, slowing it just enough for me to slide, hooking one foot out from under it and causing it to fall, a move I'd practiced numerous times at the guild…

And it lands directly on top of me, knocking every bit of air from my lungs. The shock almost – almost – keeps me from angling one more energy round from my pistol, up through the bottom of its skull… just as it scratches my face off.

***

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"Gaaah!"

Okay, so that resurrection hurt a little more than the last one. Just a little.

…

Enough that I still can't see. I'm not even sure if I'll see normally again, not like this.

I don't even see the slap coming.

"Ack, owww! What was that for!?" I whimper, rubbing my now twice-sore face.

A huff of air is most of my answer, the rest being a quiet, "Stupid."

"Yes, stupid," I hear Nebora's voice add.

"Very," Gattas thirds.

And then I'm wrapped up in an unexpectedly gentle hug.

As Gattas' healing magic starts muting my unsurprisingly heavy bruising the archer's voice brushes my ear, almost too quiet to hear.

"Thank you."

…

She smells nice. It's… some kind of ivy, I think...?

Maybe.

And just like that, I drift away from consciousness.

***

The roof of Tristan's yurt is the first thing to greet me when I wake, and the second is Olive sprawled on my chest, watching my face expectantly.

The third, however? Is the marquee of System messages queued up in the corner of my mind. So I give them a look.

The first ones are obvious enough – I have enough experience for another level.

Five. I've reached level five. Or, well. I will have, once I actually take the advancement. If I'd had better timing, maybe I could have triggered it before I blacked out.

Noticing nobody else is around at the moment I check the time… sure enough, mid-morning. Of course nobody is here… mom is at work while Tristan is off doing whatever it is he does during the day – I'm still not exactly sure what that is.

I actually don't know that much about him, come to think of it.

Oh well.

Anyway, nobody else is around, meaning there's nobody else I have to tell I'll be going back to sleep for a while as my level gets applied. Nobody seems to know why that happens, just that it's "how it is." Whatever that means. Either way, there's no getting out of it now.

[Begin Level Increase Process? Y/N]

I mentally select 'Y' and I'm promptly out like a light.

***

"Huh. She's finally leveling up."

Oh, and apparently Arty is laying across my chest here too. Er, there too. Oh… oh, hells with it.

When I'm in, I'm her apparently. Still not sure that's how it worked out… it's definitely not how I programmed it, but it's fine I guess.

I wonder what Classes I'll get offered, hopefully something good!

My sleeping wife shifts slightly as I scratch behind one of her ears. She's still wearing her headset, so clearly she's still watching Sadie.

…

Do we normally sleep when we're logged in or is she actually asleep as her smaller self?

And, uh. Is she in there normally either? I'm guessing not, considering she even showed up there as a little fae fox thing. That's… not how it's suppose to work.

Right?

…

…

I guess I can just ask around.

***

"Good gods!" I blurt as I spill tea all over my dress – one of my favorites, a blue one I tend to wear around my home.

It did it again, because of course it did. Showing up completely unannounced, I mean! Not that it cares, of course.

"Hello, Eris! I've come to play!"

I glower as politely as I can muster without actually concealing my displeasure. "Hello, Nemesis. To what… pleasure do I owe your visit today then, hmmm?"

The god-eating monster smiles brilliantly. "Well, first I really did want to visit. It's been some time! I wanted to see how everything was going, and whether or not my sister ruined your relationship yet like she did ours."

"Ah," I say through gritted teeth, "I see. Yes, of course you are, aren't you?"

"Yep! I wouldn't say it if it wasn't true. Unlike a lot of you folks, but you're better than them so it doesn't matter anyway. Right? Right!"

…

Nemesis smiles expectantly at me for a moment before I sigh and produce another teacup for it, which it takes happily.

Is it just me or is its mood somehow better than usual? Not that it's typically in sour spirits when it visits… I wonder if that's intentional.

"No, no. We're fine, really. I understand that the two of you don't get along-"

"More like she tried to torture and murder me soul-first, yes," it interrupts, "but do go on, I suppose that's a close enough description."

"Uh huh."

"Yeah!"

I sigh and continue, "As I was saying… we're fine. We don't get together much outside of Extra Life, and that's not an issue."

"Does she act any differently there than on the outside?"

"Yes," I say with a nod.

"I see. So, that brings me to my second question. Or, questions really. What happens when you're logged in? To your real body I mean. Or, uh, this body, since your other one is still real even if it isn't really you."

I shrug. "According to my attendants, I simply sit still where I was when I started. Why?"

"Oh, no reason! Anyway, do you remember who you are there?"

"Obviously so."

"Huh."

…

…

These are… kind of odd questions, but I can make a handful of assumptions from them…

Not that I'm going to let on to that. The last thing I want Nemesis to know is that I have any kind of leverage over them. Although… if it's playing its own game then with any luck it'll just stay there and leave the planes alone.

Not that it'll leave me alone though, clearly.

Mercifully, Nemesis doesn't stay much longer than enough to drain its tea and then with a few words of thanks, vanishes through another hole it rips in my plane.

Good riddance.

…

I need to talk to the pantheon. Maybe we can use what I've learned.

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