King Eduard the Defenestrator, Queen Eleanor, Duke Armand, a few torturers, and I were in the dungeon of the first person on my list's castle. Several prisoners had been lined up on the walls. All of them were Motteburh nobles. An aristocratic woman had a sign above them that read:

Dumbass who fell for the rope and box trap.

"I didn't fall for it," she grumbled. "I just got too curious. Can you really blame me for that?"

She looked a lot like Astrid, and I quickly realized who she was. But before I could speak, a nobleman shouted.

"How dare you imprison us in this dungeon! We are of the gentry! We deserve better quarters than this! Especially after you insulted us by only inviting low-ranking Motteburh nobles to that feat! Why should they go while we do not?"

"You are trespassers in Greenrivers, and an important event at that," King Eduard said. "Your status is the only reason you still live. If you were commoners, I would have thrown you out a window. In fact, if we were in Motteburh, I would have you executed for speaking to one of your betters without being spoken to first."

The nobleman was at least smart enough to shut up when he heard those words.

King Eduard walked up and down the row of prisoners. All of them were chained up.

"You will remain here until a resolution is met with Motteburh, at least. Some of you might not leave at all," the monarch stated.

He stopped right in front of the person who fell for my trap. His eyes narrowed.

"Duchess Ardone, you have fallen far," King Eduard said.

"Spare me your pity, Your Majesty. I merely let a moment of curiosity get the better of me," she replied.

"Perhaps you did," Queen Eleanor spoke up. "Or perhaps there is more to this?"

Duchess Ardone narrowed her eyes. But she kept her tone polite.

"Whatever do you mean, Your Majesty?"

King Eduard gestured for me to come forward. I did as commanded, stepping in front of Duchess Ardone. Even though they were cousins, her resemblance to Astrid was uncanny. And thinking about how she might have tried to have Astrid killed made my blood boil.

That was probably why His Majesty didn't bring Astrid or Johannes here. I doubt either of them could have kept their composure. Then, finding out the truth would have been much more difficult.

"Duchess Ardone, do you know where your cousin is?" King Eduard asked.

She looked confused.

"Which cousin? I have several," Ardone answered.

"Astrid," I replied.

Ardone scoffed.

"How am I supposed to know where that bastard is?" she questioned.

Those words sent a twinge of anger through my body. I was ready to beat the living shit out of...

"Calm down, Gustav. Remember that Astrid is a bastard in the literal sense. That's probably what she means," Dʰéǵʰom said.

The deity's words calmed me down. I was able to compose myself.

"Thank you, Dʰéǵʰom," I thought.

"You're welcome, Gustav," he replied.

I chose my next words with slightly more care than I usually do.

"Next question: have you heard of Saint Sir Gustav, Lord von Blitzburg?" I asked.

"Yes, I have," Duchess Ardone answered. "A saint of Greenrivers from a noble family of moderate import who recently joined King Eduard the Defenestrator's inner circle despite his age and is engaged to the Queen of Vandalland despite his station. I doubt there's anyone among the gentry who hasn't heard of him."

I scoffed and folded my arms.

"Well, now I know you're lying. There's no way every noble's heard of me," I said.

Duchess Ardone's jaw dropped. The other Motteburh nobles turned their heads to look at me. King Eduard gave the Motteburh aristocrats a smug smirk. Dʰéǵʰom's voice entered my head.

"Gustav, I think King Eduard's using you as an instrument of torture," the deity stated.

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"What are you talking about? I'm his economic advisor, not a torturer."

"...you know, I'll just let this be a surprise. Assuming you're not fucking with me."

"How could you not be aware of how famous you are?" one of the other Motteburh nobles spoke up.

I shook my head.

"I'm not really that important," I said. "There's no reason for me to be famous."

"You ended the battle of the three and a half armies before it even started!" another Motteburh noble stated.

"And your point is?" I asked.

"There is a giant painting with you in King Eduard's castle! All of his visitors see it!"

I shrugged.

"That can't be that many people," I said. "Besides, I'm on a dragon in it. I'm not that impressive in comparison."

The Motteburh nobles looked baffled. I was eager to get this talk back to Astrid.

"Getting back to the point, one of my retainers has recently been the subject of an assassination attempt. I am certain you know who I am talking about," I said.

No one in the room spoke. I let out a sigh and placed a hand on my forehead.

"Do these people just think that Astrid is beneath their notice?" I wondered.

"Probably," Dʰéǵʰom replied.

Shaking my head, I addressed Duchess Ardone.

"Some assassins tried to kill Astrid, who is one of my retainers. They said you were the one who sent them," I said.

I didn't know if it was a bad idea to reveal this so soon, but no one objected.

"How ridiculous," Duchess Ardone scoffed. "Assassins are expensive. Why would I waste money hiring them to kill some half-commoner bastard?"

She was awfully calm for someone who was just accused of a capital crime. That is...if she knew it was a capital crime in Greenrivers.

"You do know what happens to people who try to assassinate people here, right?" I asked.

"Yes. Your king is literally called the Defenestrator. If you think I am guilty, I will be thrown out a window," Duchess Ardone answered.

She then shrugged the best she could in her chains.

"However, I am certain that you will find my innocence."

Duchess Ardone seemed...honest. But if she didn't order the assassination attempt on Astrid, which of these nobles did? Was it even one of the Motteburh nobles in the room? Or was Duchess Ardone just lying and very good at it? How could we even investigate it without modern CSI stuff? There was a massive lack of criminal investigation magic.

Duke Armand stepped forward. He had a smile on his face, but the rest of his expression was unreadable. Yet, when I looked at his eyes, I could see the gears turning.

"My lords and ladies," he spoke up. "My King would have whoever attempted to kill the lady Astrid..."

All the Motteburh lords spoke at once.

"She isn't a lady! She's a bastard!"

Duke Armand's smile twisted into a mocking grimace.

"On the contrary. She was knighted by Sir Gustav here. That makes her a noblewoman under Greenrivers law," he said.

Rage filled the faces of the Motteburh nobles. But one of them burst out laughing, despite her rage. It was like a stereotypical ojou laugh from an anime. After a few moments, she calmed down.

"I see what your plan is, Duke Armand. Find out who the most angered is, and then use that as evidence," the noblewoman stated. "A clever plan. And it would have worked, so I will spare you the trouble. It was I all along! The long-time nemesis of Greenrivers and Duchess Adrone's family!"

All eyes were on her.

"Who is she?" I asked, turning to my king.

The noblewoman scoffed loudly.

"Of course, the man who is newly an adult..." she started.

"I'm 16. Under Greenrivers law, I've been an adult for a year," I pointed out.

"...who is almost newly an adult," the noblewoman said. "Wouldn't know who I am. But there is no way that the royalty of Greenrivers would forget their greatest enemy."

King Eduard and Queen Eleanor alike looked at her as if they had no idea who she was.

"Have we met before?" King Eduard asked.

"Never in person," the Motteburh noblewoman answered. "But I'm sure you've heard of me."

A few moments of silence passed.

"Duke Armand! You must know who I am, right?" she questioned.

"You're the Countess Toulan," he said.

"Yeah! I've been plotting against Greenrivers for years!"

"That's a surprise to me," Duke Armand stated. "You've done well to slip past my spies. But unfortunately, this is the end for you."

The Countess Toulan entered a state of utter dejection.

"I can't believe it. No one here knows what I was doing," she shook her head.

Rage pulsed through me.

"Are you fucking kidding me? You tried to assassinate one of my closest friends and frame an innocent woman! King Eduard is going to throw you out a window for this!" I slapped my forehead. "And you're more worried about people knowing who you are than your incoming doom?"

"Yes," Countess Toulan replied.

"If it makes you feel better, I didn't know who she was either," Duchess Ardone stated.

I turned to her.

"How would that make me feel better?" I asked.

The duchess shrugged. My brain was on the verge of short-circuiting from anger and frustration.

"Let this be a lesson, Gustav," Dʰéǵʰom said. "Now that you're a noble, people are plotting against you who you haven't even heard of."

"This is going to get pretty bad, isn't it?" I thought.

"Yes. If you think it's bad now, just wait until you've married Hildoara. It'll be 100 times worse then."

I suppressed a sigh.

"All the more reason why I should be there by her side. Considering how old most of the monarchs are, she's probably still building up respect."

"Good thinking, Gustav," Dʰéǵʰom said.

Duke Armand spoke up.

"As far as I can tell, Countess Toulan and Duchess Ardone are telling the truth."

King Eduard the Defenestrator nodded and stepped forward. He grabbed Countess Toulan's chains and yanked them out of the wall, dragging her out of the room.

"Wait! What are you going to do to me?" she asked.

"Is it not obvious?" my monarch scoffed. "Remember my name: King Eduard the Defenestrator."

And that's the story of the time King Eduard executed a Motteburh noble by throwing her out a window. And after holding in vomit from seeing her splatter against the ground, I went to talk to Astrid and Johannes. Seeing as things were mostly resolved, I'd have to make sure they were doing alright and knew things would be okay.

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