The Distinguished Mr. Rose (LitRPG Adventures of a Gentlemanly Madman)

Chapter 84: The Second of the Great Evils: Ears of Envy


Lucius glanced toward his fellows. The noise was deafening; he could barely hear himself think. All throughout the castle, players and Frankishmen gripped their heads in pain. Surprisingly, however, none appeared to have been bewitched by the Evil's madness. They trembled and shook, teeth grinding in struggle, but their eyes were clear, unclouded.

It would seem the expedition members had been subjected to the demons' influence so often that they finally developed a bit of resistance to it. Marco didn't even need to set himself on fire this time! Good for him. The others were in similar states, but nonetheless the danger remained.

There before them was another of the Great Evils; and unlike before, this one wasn't newly born. It had full control over its vile power.

>[EMERGENCY QUEST!]<

You have succeeded in holding out against the demonic wave and cleared the forest of its infestation. However, one last foe still awaits. The Ears of Envy has been drawn to the fragment in your Order's possession. If you do not stop it now, then everything you've accomplished will have been for naught.

Success: 1500 Cosmic Coins, a Weapon Enhancement Card, and greatly increased reputation with the Frankish Empire

Failure: Death

The thing waited eerily ahead. It moved its misshapen, lumpy ears as if to look around the castle, and then it turned back to face its prey. There was a peculiar malice in the way it presented itself. The other Evils Lucius had encountered were tormented souls; they abhorred their bodies and cried out in constant, agonizing pain. The Ears were similar in a way, but that misery was overpowered by something much more fierce — spite.

It despised the living. It hated every single person within view. Watching them now, how they shook and wrestled to remain in control, the Ears couldn't help but squirm in delight. This was a creature that took full pleasure in its task, for only when all were more miserable than it could the demon find some semblance of comfort.

"You do not even realize how blessed you are. A happy life, a normal life, those sickening smiles untainted by filth... I envy your ignorance. If only this world could know my suffering. If only all were as broken as me."

Lucius waltzed over to Sir Renaud, who had been clutching his ears in an attempt to block the noise, and tried to communicate with him using gestures and hand signs. If words could not be spoken, then they would just have to utilize other means. The gentleman was also capable of reading lips so he had no trouble interpreting him.

Renaud didn't quite understand all of his motions, but the overall meaning was conveyed: They needed to organize themselves. Fortunately, they didn't have to expend manpower on subduing the bewitched. Even without a Peer adept in combat, with these numbers they should surely be capable of slaying the wicked thing.

Renaud rallied the others and had them form ranks. The Ears was oddly docile almost as if goading them to attack. It didn't sit well with the Peer to follow along with its ploy, but there was no other choice. He raised his hand and motioned the priest to cast their spells.

But when they raised their staves and attempted to call upon the Lord, nothing came. They opened their mouths and uttered naught but silence. No one could hear them, not even their God.

Just as they began to look amongst each other, confused, the static in Lucius's ears disappeared. It was quiet, so much so that he actually found the experience to be quite relaxing. But that would soon change as a faint sound entered his eardrums. It came from the right, yet the gentleman saw nothing when he turned around. It constantly swerved along with him. It bellowed and grew louder, and louder, until it felt as if it was right next to him.

That sound was of a train's horn.

Lucius had scarcely a second to react before a whimsical cartoon train suddenly manifested by his side and rushed forward. He managed to grab Renaud and vault themselves out of the way at the last second, but the locomotive didn't stop there. It surged ahead and unleashed a loud shrill, trampling underneath a few poor paladins unfortunate enough to be caught in its path.

It was impossible; the thing popped out of thin air. Yet, just as quickly as it appeared, the train vanished along with the sound, leaving the expedition to gape in horror at the bloody pulverized remains of their fellows.

Mister Crowley the bomberman stomped his foot in anger and threw one of his homemade explosives. It landed right next to the Ears, ready to burst… but it didn't. The expedition couldn't hear the fuse or anything detonate, and so it merely laid there: inactive.

Mili tried to strum her guitar and blast the demon with a bolt of lightning, but there was no music, no electric crackle. No one could hear it, therefore it didn't exist.

Even Mister Cain with his guns and heavy firepower had failed to fire any bullets. He aimed and pressed the trigger, only for a prevalent silence to shroud them all.

The ranged attackers were helpless… all except for one.

A player who appeared to be Native American, Miss Enapay, brandished a throwing spear and hurled it at the demon with such speed that even Lucius would have had (slight) difficulty avoiding it. The Ears weren't as agile, however, and the bladed tip pierced right through its cartilage.

No later did her attack strike true that a garbled noise screeched in everyone's ears. The thing screamed not in pain, but humiliation. It didn't expect to have been injured so soon, and as a result, it flailed around and threw a tantrum. It was unforgivable that so lowly a people managed to lay their filthy hands on it.

Miss Enapay opened her mouth in surprise. Even she didn't expect that to have worked, but her efforts proved that physical weapons could hurt it. She quickly grabbed another spear from a seemingly-bottomless bag on her back and attacked again. This time though the Ears was prepared, and it hopped back, disappearing into the castle's halls.

It ran. It actually ran away.

The expedition didn't quite know what to do. Should they give chase? Every other demon had at least confronted them until they were critically injured before attempting to escape, but this wasn't the same. The Evil knew its weakness. It hid away before the more hands-on warriors could descend upon it.

This place once thought of as shelter had become their cage. Lucius couldn't recall the castle unlike the shop's other products, so the only escape was out through the gate… or with the demon's death.

They had to proceed.

Renaud scowled and gripped his cane. To force everyone into the cramped halls all at once would be suicide, especially after having witnessed a train slaughter his people. He wracked his brain searching for a solution: perhaps it would be better to just demolish the whole place? No, he couldn't even if he wanted to. The players and priests with such destructive capabilities had been suppressed by the silence. Only those with extreme physical strength like Marco could break the walls, but he was just one man against a castle oh so big.

Lucius practically saw steam rising out of Renaud's head as he worked himself to exhaustion. Eventually, he decided on dividing them into six small, but elite, groups. The demon couldn't hunt them all at once. It had a delay in its attacks, or else it would have wrought much more harm by now, and thus Renaud used their brief encounter to come up with an analysis of its patterns. He knew every route there was out to the gates. Even if one group were to be wiped out, at least the others would be given time to escape.

Lucius bought some pieces of paper and quill for Renaud to write on. The man quickly scribbled maps of the castle and each unit's respective way out, before handing them out to the designated leaders. Lucius and his three companions, along with Renaud himself and some paladins, were part of one group (Renaud was the leader of course). The other five were evenly spread amongst players and Frankishmen.

With everything organized, the teams gave each other an acknowledging nod, before advancing into the castle. They had to be quick. Renaud set aside his pride and allowed Marco to carry him as they sprinted forward; every minute wasted put them in danger of being attacked.

But just as their nerves were at their most heightened, the silence broke, and Lucius could hear his fellows once more.

"Huh?" Mili said, looking around herself. "Woah, I can speak again!"

The musician was excited by the revelation, but Harper didn't react as enthusiastically. "Hold on here, did the demon really run away? That can't be right."

Marco grimaced. "Something's off. Hey kid, try playing your guitar real quick."

Mili did as he said and tried to strum her guitar. Nothing came out; they heard no music play.

It wasn't just her guitar they couldn't hear. Their footsteps, the air, or even any noise from other groups — the only sound permitted was their voices.

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As they were pondering this bizarre predicament, however, Renaud suddenly shouted, "Above us! Look out!"

The party quickly turned their gaze to the ceiling, only to discover nothing there.

"What was that about, fella?" Marco said to the man on his shoulder, but Renaud frantically shook his head and pointed to his mouth.

It wasn't him that spoke.

A sharp boom sounded from below, and Lucius just narrowly managed to push Marco and Renaud out of the way before they could be consumed by a sudden pillar of confetti.

"Hey, hey! That thing's right behind us!" Mili yelled, only it wasn't her. The musician was wholly in Lucius's view. Her mouth hadn't moved one bit, and yet her voice rang clearly in their heads.

The gentleman didn't need the next sound to guess what would happen next. He pushed his companions into a neighboring room just as a giant stone ball rolled right toward them as if they were in some kind of action movie. Lucius couldn't save everyone in time. A few of the paladins were pulverized into a sticky red paste.

"Godamnit!" Marco turned away and cursed under his breath. "If I reacted faster, maybe I could've saved them…"

"It is not your fault, Mister Bernardi," Lucius assured him. "We cannot trust even our own voices at the moment. For now, allow me to take the lead, and I shall know for certain when next the thing will attack."

"What, do ya have eyes on the back of your head or something?"

"Not quite, but I do have a tool quite similar."

Lucius purchased a small hand mirror from the store and adjusted it in his hand so that everyone in his group was clearly within view. "Hoho, that should do it!"

The party left the room and quickly resumed their jaunt through the castle. Meanwhile, Renaud tried to look for any signs of where the Ears could be, but it was no use. One's sight could only perceive so much. "How curious that it be fixated on us. Even in the courtyard, it chose to attack Sir Lucius."

"Actually, it wasn't me. The train's intended target was you, Sir Renaud."

The Peer blinked. "Me, you say?"

"Yes. Even our encounters just now were all centered around you as the focus."

"What have I done to draw its ire?"

"Your guess is as good as mine, my friend."

Renaud sighed and pondered to himself for a moment. "Mm, then let it be so. Perhaps this is for the better. The others shall at least be spared of its menace."

"That's noble and all, Mister Peer Sir," Mili said. "But that means we're kinda in a whole lotta trouble, too."

The man chuckled and pointed to Lucius. "For you, perhaps. Sir Lucius will protect me, of that I am certain."

"Yeah, kid. Hell, the demon's already got you in its grasp. Look down!"

Lucius leapt into the air and kicked away a comically large bundle of dynamite. It landed on the floor behind them and exploded with a massive bang. Marco protected them from the worst of the damage, but nonetheless the party was sent flying forward in a rush of smoke.

"Does this thing not care about the castle collapsing?" Harper gasped while picking herself up from the floor. "Any more explosions like that and we're all getting buried — demon or person alike."

"I'm guessin' it's somewhere safe from all that," Marco grumbled. He managed to avoid landing on his back, which would have crushed Sir Renaud, and lifted himself while patting the dust off his suit. "Yeah, now that I think about it, those ear things were underground to begin with, right?"

"Nah, it's definitely hiding above us. I mean, that's fucking stupid, right? What kinda dumb demon bitch would use the same trick twice? Trust me. It's not underground. Nope."

Lucius raised his brow and swerved toward Mili. She shrugged and gestured to her mouth.

"Language, my demonic friend."

"I apologize."

Without a moment to waste, Lucius rushed to the source of the sound and plunged his arm straight through the solid brick. When he felt the touch of something rough and stretchy, he grasped it tight and then pulled it out of the ground. A giant pair of ears greeted him. The demon screeched out in rage, struggling to worm itself free.

"How comforting it must be to hug those you love, to return home each day, knowing the faces of your family will be there to greet you. So simple, such a modest thing. And yet I could never have it. I looked upon my peers, and despite having what I had always envied, they took it for granted. They complained about such little things. Why, why? Why is it that those undeserving are always the ones with the greatest of gifts?"

A violent rumble began to erupt from below. Lucius reached for his cane sword, but before he could unsheathe it, a grand piano suddenly appeared a distance away. A crude, discordant smash barged into Lucius's ear as if someone were banging away at the keys with neither rhyme nor restraint. Each ear-grating pulse of melody caused the earth to shift, louder and louder, until the walls around them threatened to crumble.

"Hurry on forth, everyone!" Lucius shouted to the others. "Escape firstly, and I shall catch up in a moment's notice."

They tried to protest, but the ceiling soon collapsed and separated the gentleman from his charming companions. Vaulting over the brick would be a simple task. Firstly, however, there was a demon to deal with.

"Well, are you in an agreeable mood now? I say this with all due modesty, but your prior fellows quite enjoyed my discussions," Lucius said, tossing the demon to the ground. Balancing amidst all this tremor and tremble would ordinarily be difficult for the average person, but Lucius was quite accustomed to uneven surfaces — such as the time he stowed away on a ship commanded by Somali pirates, only to be forced into a battle of life or death against a colossal aquatic creature of legend known as the Kraken. His boots were soaked quite thoroughly that day!

"I wanted to be normal. The people filled my ears with envy, longed for the riches and power I wielded, but in truth I would have given it all up if it meant I could live a mundane life. I wouldn't care about being poor. I didn't need a grand purpose to fulfill."

"People, as a constant, tend to obsess over what they lack rather than what they already have. You said it yourself, my friend. The people envied you just as you did them."

"Someone like you can never understand. I can't hear it, nothing at all. The cries of envy have never once left your lips. You will never fathom the misery it brings, or the constant urge, the ridicule and shame, that burrows so, so deep. Husk. Pretender! How dare you try to fool me while wearing the mask of man."

Well, this was certainly a new reaction. The demon never wanted another to understand it in the first place.

"I loathe you. I fear you, for I know there is nothing that can sway you — that endless, impermeable void of love. But the other one… I heard it. I heard it clearly. Yes, the envy threatening to consume him. So deep, so visceral a hatred. How foolish that he still tries to deny it. He must be as miserable as me. No, he must be brought lower, even lower!"

Lucius had a small hunch, just a feeling mind you, that this foe would need much more than a stern talking-to if he hoped to defeat it. Thus with solemn resolve, the gentleman swished his cane sword and attempted to carve through its cartilage. The demon burrowed back into the earth before he could, though. To think it would run away again! Such a shame, truly, but at least he knew where it was heading.

With nothing else to do, Lucius vaulted over the collapsed wreckage and steadily made his way out of the castle. He encountered no more traps or tricks or dastardly attacks. The Evil had absolutely no desire, perhaps even out of terror, to see him again. Thus was his journey a short and quick one.

When he finally caught sight of the gates, who should he discover then but his four friends safe and sound outside! The other groups had also managed to escape, albeit with a few casualties. It wasn't even wrought by the demon's hand, apparently. A few unlucky sort were merely crushed under the falling rubble.

"Lucius? Holy crap, you actually made it outta there!" Mili jumped and tackled Lucius directly in the stomach, hugging him with a relieved sigh. The others soon followed and smothered him in affection. It really was wonderful to have such caring companions!

But though the gentleman was glad to see them, he tilted his head, confused, for Sir Renaud seemed perfectly okay. The Ears had proclaimed the man his target, so would it truly allow him to get away now?

"You may let me down now," Renaud said to Marco. The indignified Peer returned back to solid ground and coughed. "It is good that we escaped, but the demon still lives. For as long as it remains as such we will be in constant danger. It is better we make our stand here whilst it has no structure to hide in."

"That is quite reasonable. One problem, however."

"What would that be?"

"The demon doesn't need to hide anymore."

Sir Renaud paled. Panic spread across his face, for it wasn't Lucius that spoke.

Before anyone could react, the Ears burst out of the ground behind Renaud, and it whisked him away without a sound, without a cry. The Peer disappeared, leaving the dazed expedition to fester in their horror.

Their leader was gone.

"He… he's dead," Harper whispered. "Just like that. We couldn't even do anything."

The others were in similar disbelief, except for one. Lucius shook his head and comforted everyone with an inspiring rally. Sir Renaud might not be lost just yet.

"Do not despair," Lucius said, actually said this time. "Our commander still lives, of this I am sure. Although I cannot speak for how long that shall hold true."

"Then what're we supposed to do?" Marco asked.

Lucius smiled, and then pointed back to the castle. "Not we, I'm afraid. Renaud lies somewhere in the castle, but to enter now whilst moments away from collapsing would be suicide for all but me. I succeeded in escaping alone once. I shall do so again."

"You don't want us to come with you? Not gonna lie, but it sounds like you're the suicidal one, Lucius," Mili objected.

"It will be fine, my dear. I have my own method of escape should it come to it."

Lucius reached into his pocket and pulled out the homeward jewel Renaud had given him. "The good sir imparted this to me quite a while ago. If I am in danger, I merely need to activate it, and it will bring me back out here."

That was a lie, of course. It would actually bring him back to the capital, but they didn't have to know that.

"Well… if you say so," Mili relented. "But still. Be careful. I'm never gonna forgive ya if you somehow kick the bucket out there."

Lucius chuckled and ruffled her hair, before confidently marching back into the castle.

He wondered how Renaud was doing at the moment. The man had a surprisingly strong mind, but in the clutches of a demon… well, the gentleman supposed he would soon find out. Perhaps the Evil's influence was just the thing Renaud needed to finally bloom.

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