Curses are stupid, classes are stupid, and I was going to punch Merripen in the face if I ever got the chance.

Jarec was less bothered than I was. Because he wasn't stuck sitting at the base of a tree watching the rest of the class interact with their summons. Because his was swirling around his feet in calm counter-clockwise circles. A tornado perfectly under his control.

I tried to keep my jealousy under control. If I was pouting I don't think anyone could tell.

I let out a slow breath and stretched my legs out from under me. It was the first time since the manifestation exercise that we'd had Spellcraft out of the classroom. Professor Telvis hadn't told me to sit this out, I'd opted out of even trying under my own volition. No need to humiliate myself when I already knew the outcome.

It was fine. I was fine.

A red butterfly fluttered in front on my face and then floated upwards before I felt a slight weight on my hair. It must have landed there.

I was debating how petulant it would be to wave the thing away when someone in pink started to approach out of the corner of my eye.

I took a very slow and deep breath.

Angelina was being swarmed by them. Dozens of the little things. They looked barely any different from real ones. Fluttering around in all directions but never straying too far from their source.

I held my left wrist to my chest and rubbed my thumb over the curse mark. The gloves on my hands covering what we all knew was there. The scars were still there, but I had made peace with having to just live with them.

"You can take those off, if you want," Angelina said as she lowered herself onto the grass in front of me. Her legs folded under her like she was kneeling.

"I'm good. The gloves aren't bothering me," I told her.

Jarec was giving me a strange look. One I wasn't confident I could interpret. Then he spoke, "But something is."

"Something's always bothering me. I exist in a near constant state of bothered. Nothing worth worrying you guys over." I let go of my arm and rested both hands in my lap.

Neither of them looked particularly happy about my answer. I rolled my eyes and waited for one of them to say something.

Instead, Angelina just looked at me expectantly. If she was expecting me to continue she was going to be disappointed.

I brought my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around them. My left wrist resting my right hand. I was thankful my foul mood wasn't making the curse act up.

Jarec's tornado stopped its spinning around him and stilled at his feet. It reminded me of a shy pet. It must be nice, not having a summon that wants to take your hand off.

It wasn't their fault. But I didn't have to like it.

"I'm fine guys, really." As fine as I could be as long as I remained cursed.

(*********)

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I suppose in a way, History was a bit of a mercy. My lack of magical ability didn't matter for a little while. The slowness of the time here helped me think.

Russel was tapping his desk impatiently. I couldn't really blame him.

Professor Dellik was standing in front of the class as usual. We have a little less than two more weeks of this. "What I want all of you to take away from this class, regardless of where the winds of fate lead you is that History is about mistakes. From all sides. Choices and the consequences of them. We can never know for sure what will happen, what events we've set in motion. Making mistakes is near impossible to avoid, but that should never stop you from trying entirely."

Mistakes huh? I've probably made a few of those since coming here. But I wouldn't take any of it back for the world. Consequences be damned.

Even with my curse, I was happy here. And I was going to break the curse. I refused to be stopped from finding a place in the world by an asshole I'd never met.

(*********)

By lunch my mood was better. Celica was complaining as we left Alchemy together.

"I can't believe he stuck me with a paper instead of our final lab. You, I understand. But I'm not the walking disaster waiting to happen, why am I being punished?"

"Maybe he's trying to let his Tower shine. For once. We've been running circles around them in most of the labs."

She narrowed her eyes at me, "You say the weirdest things sometimes, have we told you that?"

I sighed, "You aren't the first person to tell me that. And I doubt you'll be the last. But give it a bit more time and we'll figure something out."

Time was something we had. Four and a half more years of it. And even more than that if we wanted.

Celica scoffed, "Sure. I'll play along for now. Maybe once we figure out who your friend Red is."

What did Red have to do with anything? "What?"

"You and her still talk, and I have questions she seems to be the only one with answers about any of this."

She was changing the subject on me. But I didn't know why.

I shrugged, "She hasn't told me anything that might tell us who she is or where she's from."

"According to you."

"What, you don't trust me?"

"You? Mostly. Your judgement? Not in the slightest."

"We can always have another vote for Tower Representative."

"You're not getting out of it Serafina."

"A girl can try."

"Put that effort somewhere else."

The joke was on her, I had lots of effort to go around.

(*********)

That night was quiet. Which was good because I wanted to make a call. My ComMirror was propped up on a pillow. My reflection stared back at me as I tried to think of what I wanted to say.

I felt tired, more wore down then I expected. I considered just going to sleep. But I wanted to talk with Dad. But I would see him soon. Just two weeks. Then we could talk in person. Maybe this could wait.

But…

I took a deep breath and tapped the glass. "Victor Stewart."

He only kept me waiting for barely a few seconds. "Good evening, Serafina. Though I imagine it's a bit late for you."

"Yeah. Going to get some sleep here soon just…" I trailed off and sighed.

"Hmm. I see."

Did he?

"You need a break from all the magic."

"I might. I think. I mean… I'm…happy. But…"

"There's something missing?"

"There's…something. I don't know if it's missing or if…what if I… There's always a chance of something going wrong. What happens when it does?"

"Ah. Worried it's going too well?"

"Maybe? I mean…not everything but the other Dragons…"

"You like having friends."

"Who wouldn't? And I don't know what I'll do if this doesn't work out."

"You're a smart girl. And if these friends of yours are worth keeping around a few mistakes won't mean the end."

"I don't know if smart's going to do me any favors. It didn't before."

"There's something specific." Couldn't fool Dad, but neither could Mom so it wasn't like I had a chance.

"They want to know the 'real' me," I explained.

"Ah. I see the problem." Of course he'd understand. That's why I called him.

"Yeah."

"Have you told them that you haven't figured out who that is?"

"I did. But I don't know if they understand it. That I don't know how to begin learning who that is."

"You're sixteen. I can't think of anyone who wasn't figuring that out at your age. If they really care, and you really try. I'm sure it will be okay. Lucinda and I wouldn't have sent you there if we thought you'd be miserable."

"I know. But you two aren't perfect."

"No. We're not. But that's why there's two of us."

What a way to tell me to trust in the others. But maybe he was right. Maybe whatever was waiting for me, was best faced with them. Running and hiding hadn't gotten me far in the past, why would it now?

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