"You have to go downstairs," Tanya told a bewildered Mrs Eceer, who looked up from her book with sharp suspicion.
"Why?" Mrs Eceer asked, narrowing her eyes over the rims of her reading glasses. Her voice was prim, but with an edge that suggested she wasn't used to being bossed around.
"You just do. Trust me," Tanya replied, trying to keep a straight face.
With a soft sigh of disapproval, Mrs Eceer slid the thin black ribbon into her notebook and stood. The plates beside her gave a polite clink as she moved, remnants of a breakfast clearly interrupted. Tanya's eyes were immediately drawn to the centre plate. A couple of stray pieces of toast had survived the morning rush. She swiped one and chomped it happily, licking a smear of something sweet from her thumb.
"Well?" Mrs Eceer said, voice crisp. The I'm waiting hung in the air like a bell.
Fahad peeked around the doorway, his head tilted and mouth open in mild confusion. His hair was a soggy mess, plastered to his forehead. "Huh?" he muttered, blinking. He gave an exaggerated flick of his head, trying to toss the wet mop aside, but it only slapped back down with a damp splat.
"You too. And Ishita," Tanya said, gesturing toward her bedroom with her toast hand, crumbs scattering like confetti. Her voice was muffled around the bite in her cheek. It was still a bit surreal seeing people in her space, even if she'd told Ishita to make herself at home.
Ishita emerged a moment later, wrapped in a towel turban and wearing a freshly washed—though still clearly stained—outfit. Tanya felt a rush of envy.
Bein' clean. I need to get on that.
Tanya caught a whiff of her own lingering scent—half body odour, half the sweet and rotten smell of monster blood.
Ugh. That smell'll put me off pudding…
"What's going on?" Ishita asked, ruffling her damp hair through the towel.
"You just have to see. Come on," Tanya said, practically bouncing on her toes. She bit her lip to hold in a grin, then turned and bounded down the stairs two at a time. Halfway down, she glanced over her shoulder and caught Fahad crouching to copy her—only to be yanked back by Ishita before he could tumble.
"Careful!" Tanya called, then shoved the last of her toast into her mouth and licked her fingers with exaggerated satisfaction.
"This better be worth my time," Mrs Eceer muttered from the flat's threshold, but she followed anyway.
"Oh, just you wait," Tanya said, grinning.
At the bottom of the stairs, Tanya did what she knew she had to—summon Assistant. It pulsed out of the ink beneath her skin like it had been waiting, gripping her forearm in confusion at the movement.
"Got a surprise for you, Assistant!"
The cold winter morning met her as she stepped outside, sunshine warming the edges of her skin despite the chill in the breeze. Her hair blew in lazy waves across her eyes. She'd meant to get it trimmed before the apocalypse. Now it just sort of... existed.
Not too long 'til I pull the scissors out myself, she thought, pushing her fringe aside to get a better look at the hulking form ahead.
And there she was—Fifi. Tanya had seen her moments earlier but her breath still caught in her throat. Tanya's grin widened as she looked between the monster dog and the front door, counting down in her head.
The reactions were so worth it.
Assistant saw first. After a quick glance at Tanya's smug expression, it turned, noticed Fifi—and immediately formed a trembling little fist.
"No, bud. It's a friend."
Assistant hesitated, then pointed a stubby finger at Fifi, raising a confused thumbs-up.
"Yeah, everythin's fine. Olena's friends."
With a relieved little flop, Assistant gave her a wave and retreated into her skin. Tanya chuckled softly. Tanya laughed, very endeared by how Assistant checked they were safe then noped out.
Fahad skipped out of the doorway next, his face shifting from confusion to awe in a heartbeat. Behind him, Ishita stepped onto the pavement and froze solid.
Tanya watched her expression cycle through a strange variation of the seven stages of grief—shock, disbelief, horror, reluctant awe—until she stood with one hand over her chest like she might have a heart attack.
Mrs Eceer picked up on the energy from halfway up the stairs. She quickened her pace, speed-walking in that unbothered-but-stressed old lady way. When she reached the door and finally caught sight of Fifi, her jaw dropped and she reflexively made the sign of the cross, fingertips lingering over the little metal cross around her neck.
"You should say hi!" Olena called from across the street, her voice loud and warm, the accent unmistakably Eastern European and delightfully sassy.
Mrs Eceer did not move. "I think this is close enough, thank you very much," she muttered, still eyeing the massive dog with a mix of fear and righteous judgment.
Fahad, of course, had no such qualms. He was already off—running full-speed toward Fifi with arms flung wide, legs pumping like he was in a cartoon. Ishita raised a feeble hand to stop him but was far too late.
Tanya could see it all play out on Ishita's face—her maternal instinct screaming no, her rational mind remembering this was an ally, and her general sense of chaos completely overwhelmed. She took a few brisk steps forward, started to jog, then slowed, unsure if she should run or let him go.
Everyone's eyes were darting across the street now—Tanya included. It felt safe-ish in a group this big, especially with Olena and Fifi looming like bodyguards, but nobody wanted to get caught unaware.
"Fifi!" Fahad yelled, giddy.
The beast turned at the sound, its eyes locking on the small figure sprinting toward it. It let out a deep chuff of excitement, tugging at its leash, massive paws bouncing like a creature a tenth its size.
It was a dog move, completely ordinary—if you ignored the fact that this dog could probably bowl over a van.
"Boy after own heart!" Olena whooped, jumping in place like a proud aunt.
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"Careful!" Ishita called at the same time, failing to mask her anxiety.
Boris murmured something softly as he reached up to stroke Fifi's thick shoulder, the highest point he could comfortably reach. Tanya only caught the words "good girl," spoken in a gentle, reverent tone that felt wildly out of place given the monster's proportions.
Fahad finally reached her. Tanya held her breath. Ishita audibly gasped behind her.
Fahad stopped with his arms still outstretched for a hug. Fifi gave him a lazy bat with one paw—claws sheathed but still the size of his head. A glowing shield flickered into existence just in time, absorbing the swipe with a low hum as Boris yanked back the leash. But Fahad was already gone, slipping into the pavement like a drop of ink into water, reappearing behind her.
With a cartoonish little sumo stance, he launched himself at her back, arms spread like a cape. Fifi twisted left and right, trying to see where he'd vanished to, but he was already flopped along her spine, giggling into her fur and kicking his legs like he was riding a furry rollercoaster.
He can handle himself, Tanya reminded herself, though her stomach only partially unclenched.
"I've always wanted a dog big enough to ride!" Fahad shouted with unfiltered glee.
Fifi gave a little buck, playful, but still enough to jolt his small frame. He slid down her shoulder, laughing, arms clinging around her thick neck. She twisted her maw around and gnashed her jaws at the spot where he'd just been—but he vanished again, slipping into the shadows under her throat before her teeth could snap closed.
Tanya's eyes widened. Now that she could see clearly beneath the rows of gnarled teeth and twisted, nightmare anatomy, it was obvious: Fifi was playing. Her movements were deliberately slow. Careful, even.
Bloody hell, Tanya thought. If this is her holding back…
She didn't want to know what Fifi looked like in a fight where she wasn't trying to be gentle. Whatever vague yearning she'd had for a pet like Fifi evaporated on the spot.
They regrouped in the middle of the street, the scene calming slightly.
"Not to break up this… reunion," Mrs Eceer said, her voice cutting through the noise like a sewing needle. She paused, clearly searching for a diplomatic adjective and coming up empty. "But this has been a rather loud endeavour, right before we explore the neighbourhood. Wouldn't you agree?"
Fahad's grin faltered. "Oops. Sorry." He slithered down Fifi's side and took a few guilty steps back.
Trying to redirect, Olena gestured enthusiastically. "Everyone! Boris, this is Mrs Eceer, Fahad, and Ishita. Everyone, Boris!"
The group offered awkward waves or nods. Tanya raised her hand in a vague hello, still keeping half her attention on Fifi. The creature seemed content for now, panting steam in the cold morning air.
"Should we, uh, go inside?" Tanya offered, glancing at the drawn curtains above their safehouse.
"No point," Mrs Eceer said bluntly, adjusting the scarf tucked around her neck. "Anyone in the area knows we're here already. Will that be a problem?" She turned sharply toward Boris and Olena.
"Nope!" Olena replied, voice chipper. "Fifi and Boris are higher level than me, and I upgraded gun! We power-horse!"
"House," Boris corrected gently.
"Why would a house represent power…? Oh! Is it electric power?" she asked, eyes lighting up.
Before Tanya could explain, Mrs Eceer took over with a mini-lecture on the etymology of "powerhouse," segueing fluidly into Greek roots and 19th-century industry. Olena babbled about some Greek guy she used to know. They either didn't notice or didn't mind that they were having two entirely separate conversations.
Tanya leaned toward Boris. "How'd you manage your upgrades? Olena said she only got hers because of some haunted shippin' container and a ghost guy."
Boris gave a small, dry smile. "Nothing so exciting. Fifi grows stronger from what she consumes, and I've had to keep up. Out of necessity." One of his eyes twitched slightly.
Tanya swallowed. That means… if his level wasn't high enough, he wouldn't be standing here right now.
She looked at Fifi again and quickly retracted every fantasy she'd ever had about having a Fifi of her own.
"Let's get geared up and go, yeah?" Tanya called, raising her voice to cut through Olena and Mrs Eceer's deepening Greek-off. Ishita had crouched next to Fahad, smiling about his excited rambles about him always wanting a puppy. At Tanya's shout, everyone glanced over.
"We better make it quick," Mrs Eceer said, already moving toward the door. Her posture was tight, and the emotional static around her felt like a thundercloud. "And let's hope we can defend ourselves as well as they say."
Boris adjusted his glasses with a small wince. "I didn't mean to cause such… loud excitement with Fifi," he offered.
"Oh no, I should be the one apologising," Ishita said, stepping into pace beside him. They both awkwardly bowed their heads at the same time, blocking the doorway as they continued a mutual-apology-off while Boris knotted Fifi's leash to the front barricade.
Tanya and Fahad exchanged a look and a shrug.
"Mums," Fahad muttered, shaking his head like a tiny old man. "What can you do?"
"You ready?" Tanya asked, bumping his shoulder.
"Ohhh yeah," Fahad grinned, eyes gleaming. "We're gonna kick some monster butt!" They shared a crisp fistbump.
Tanya's eyes landed on Boris as Ishita walked inside.
Wonder how much he knows.
"Just give me a sec, yeah bud?"
"Kay!" Fahad ran off.
Fifi wagged furiously as Boris bent down to tether her leash. He weaved it in and out of the battlements, muttering gentle nothings in what could've been baby talk or battlefield commands. She gave one last growl of betrayal as he stood up.
"That dog's really somethin'," Tanya said, coming up behind him.
"She looks different now," he muttered, eyes on the hulking mass of Fifi beside them, her chain rattling as she shifted on the pavement. "Acts different in some ways, too. But she's still my Fifi."
Tanya leaned against the doorframe. "Got a sec?"
"Course."
Tanya took a breath. "We need materials for the shop, but Ishita and Fahad need to level up. That's my biggest priority."
"I gathered that." Boris raised an eyebrow. "What level is she?"
"Three."
Boris froze. "Three? Good grief."
"Yeah, I know," Tanya muttered, watching through the gap as Fahad struggled under layers of cold-weather gear.
"But she's been out before, fought monsters, hasn't she?" Boris asked, brow furrowing.
"Yeah." Tanya said, eyes flicking to the slushy mess in the street "She charged into a mob to save her kid. Got a Class out of it. Lost an arm, too." Tanya's voice softened. "It was close."
"What's her Class?" Boris asked, his frown deepening.
"Martyr." Tanya wrinkled her nose.
Boris let out a low whistle, the sound muffled by the wind. "Poor thing. Reward and punishment all in one. System's way of balancing things, I suppose."
"She's tough, though. Bad class, but she's keepin' on," Tanya said, crossing her arms. "We just need to give her the tools she needs."
Boris straightened, his voice tinged with mischief. "Well, I suppose I'll have to keep up appearances, then. Wouldn't want to be outdone by a teenager."
Tanya eyed him with a raised eyebrow. "I ain't a teenager, and you're not exactly lagging behind. What level are you?"
"Eight."
She blinked. "Eight?! Are you serious? I know Olena mentioned it, but damn."
Boris gave her a sideways grin. "You didn't think I was all bark and no bite, did you?" He chuckled, losing his composure, and a wheeze of laughter escaped him.
Tanya gave him a pointed look. "No offense, but you look like a Level 4 geezer with a posh accent and a dog."
"The accent's not level-dependent," he retorted, looking proud. "And Fifi's no ordinary dog."
Tanya pressed her hands into the cold stone doorway to get out of the wind, her fingers stiff in the chill. She narrowed her eyes. "Right. Go on, then. How'd she get a class?"
Boris's grin turned smug, like someone about to drop a punchline. "She ate a monster core."
Tanya nearly choked on her smoke. "Come again? Boris, you said it wasn't an interesting story!"
He held up a finger. "Aha, well, you asked about mine. I got my class through training with her. Simple."
"So she ate a monster core," Tanya said, leaning in, her curiosity piqued.
"Yes, she did. Swallowed it whole, then had the audacity to burp afterward. Not ten minutes later, she charged into a fight and—well—saved my life."
"She saved you… after eating a core?"
Boris nodded, scratching Fifi's ear affectionately. "Yep."
Tanya scoffed. "That's not a thing, Boris."
"It was that day."
She gave him an incredulous look. "What were you fighting? A sentient dust bunny?"
"Mini-boss," he said, with a shrug. "Big nasty thing. We didn't stand a chance. Thought we were done for, but then—boom—everything stopped. Frozen. Something got inside it. Possessed it, maybe. Whatever it was, it held the monster long enough for Fifi to finish it off."
Tanya narrowed her gaze, her mind spinning. "What kind of 'something'?"
Boris brushed a bit of glass off the barricade and perched casually on it. "Well, very hard to describe. Kind of like a drag queen, if I'm honest."
"…What?"
"Short blonde hair, like a choirboy. But with this enormous pink fur coat and flame-shaped sunglasses. Big dramatic entrance. Felt like he should've had backup dancers." He looked at her open mouth and seemed to misunderstand. "I'm up to date with the times you know. My granddaughter told me all about it."
Her stomach twisted as if something inside her recoiled. The cold air cut into her skin, but it wasn't enough to numb the creeping dread.
"Pink coat. Blonde hair. Flame-shaped glasses?"
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