"You're in gang?" Olena looked Tanya up and down. "You do not look like someone in gang."

Tanya started toward the shop. "Heh, it's just a turn of phrase—like a group, a crew."

Olena trailed after her. "Ahh, makes sense. I think—woman with stringy arm like that, not gang material. My uncle's cousin's best friend was head of Russian Mafia."

"So you're Russian then?" Tanya asked.

"Darling, I'm from everywhere."

Tanya chuckled, then pushed the door open—and stopped short.

It was a scene.

Mrs Eceer stood braced like a fortress in front of Ishita, a scattered array of smaller shields forming a bizarre beehive around them. Ishita sat up, hugging her knees with one arm to stay upright, the other gripping a snapped floorboard that trembled with her. Fahad stood between them, lantern held high over his head like a hammer mid-swing. It wasn't a very practical stance, but the spiked end of the lantern hanging down his back looked dramatic. Sweat beaded on his forehead from holding it so long, and his panting kind of killed the cool factor.

"It's alright, guys—" Tanya began.

"So much magic!" Olena squealed, breezing in without a flicker of fear. The three flinched. She paid it no mind, pacing right up to the barrier and peering at each of them in turn.

"Oooo, grey skin—very end-of-world chic." She turned to Fahad. "You are very small boy for such big weapon—very much boy after my own heart." Then, to the barrier, flicking it with her finger. It clinked. "Shield—very useful. If I could go poof and make shield, I wouldn't need to carry gear. Very lucky."

By the end of her assessment, Ishita and Fahad had both lowered their weapons. The three of them now looked about as bewildered as Tanya had felt outside. She barely suppressed a laugh.

Mrs Eceer dropped the shields and planted her fists on her hips. "Either you are the strangest assassin I've ever met, or you're not here to hurt us."

Olena's eyes lit up. "Oh! Are you one of those transgenders?"

Tanya winced. Mrs Eceer looked like she'd been slapped. Fahad glanced up at Ishita with a she really said that? expression. Ishita pursed her lips at him, silencing any reply.

Mrs Eceer's face hardened, nostrils flaring. "I'm a woman, I'll have you know, and—"

Olena raised her hands. "I am sorry! I say wrong? I don't mean it bad."

Mrs Eceer's jaw clenched. "It's not just the words. It's... complicated."

Olena nodded solemnly. "Yes, yes. Complicated. Like visa paperwork. But I like it. I like that you are… how do I say… you are being who you are. No pretending. Very strong."

Mrs Eceer blinked, visibly thrown.

"You know," Olena continued, "in my village, we have woman who grow beard. She win cheese festival three years in row. No one care. People say, 'That is just Margo, she is loud and eats onions like apple.'" She grinned, proud. "So I think you are like Margo—in good way."

Mrs Eceer raised an eyebrow. "That's… not quite the same."

"Yes, yes," Olena waved her off. "But still. You are real. Not fake. I respect this."

Tanya bit back a grin. A situation as awkward like this—what could you do but laugh?

Mrs Eceer glanced between them all—her tension softening into confusion, and then… maybe a flicker of amusement.

"I… appreciate that," she said, cautiously.

Olena beamed. "Good! So, we are friends now. Tanya, what is the plan for shop? I see you have much work. How you get customer if it look like drug den, hm?"

Now it was Tanya's turn to feel lost. "Wait, what?"

"Is your shop, yes?" Olena said slowly.

Tanya looked around at the wreckage. This was absurd. "Uh, yeah?"

"You get customer to run shop, yes?" Olena said, even slower.

Tanya opened her mouth. Closed it again. She gestured at the boarded windows and the inky acid chewing through the planks. "I mean… not since the world ended?"

Olena looked horrified. "But—but—your tattoo got so much cooler! Plus, you give to grey woman and small boy."

Fahad marched over and held out a hand. "I'm Fahad."

She shook it. Assistant appeared beside him, offering itself too. She shook Assistant even harder.

Tanya frowned, thrown, trying to get back on track. "Well, yes, I did give them tattoos, but that was more of a favour—"

"Tsk, tsk, tsk," Olena clicked her tongue. "Terrible business practice. Should be fair trade. And in this shop! I fix up for you if you give me tattoo—" she spun on her heel, finger wagging—"And tattoo for Boris if he help. And tattoo Boris dog if he help too."

She turned back to the room, hand on her chin, surveying the damage like a contractor. "May need to make that two tattoos if rot go all way through."

Ishita stared at Olena like she'd just declared war on gravity. "You want… tattoos? In exchange for fixing this?" She pointed to the monster blood damage, the scratched-up walls, and the pile of monster bodies. They'd begun to rot—or as seemed usual for these monsters—melt. Their once muscular bodies looked like half-melted ice cream.

This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.

"Yes," Olena said, like it was obvious. "Barter economy, darling. Is very trendy." She shuffled to the side and held a hand out to Ishita. "Olena," she said.

"Ishita," Ishita stammered back. She still looked weak but she leant forward to shake Olena's hand, then collapsed back again from the effort.

Tanya just looked between them all.

Running my tattoo shop in an apocalypse… Fixing up the parlour… Wait—

"You want me to tattoo a dog?" Tanya asked.

Olena waved her hand. "He is very well-behaved. He sit still. You draw flower. Or steak. He like steak."

Tanya reached for words that didn't come. "I'm—I'm not tattooing a steak on a dog," she eventually stammered.

Fahad spoke up with a huge grin. "I'd pay to see that."

Olena spun dramatically toward him. "See! Business already! Boy understands value of niche market."

Mrs. Eceer sighed and rubbed her temple. Ishita had fully sat down now, still holding the broken floorboard like a safety blanket.

"Trading isn't our priority," Mrs. Eceer muttered. "We need to stay safe."

"Actually…" Tanya said, her mouth barely ahead of her thoughts. "She may have a point."

"She does?" Mrs Eceer said.

"I do?" Olena said. "I mean, of course I do… How do I have point?"

"We need more food, and if we might need to face bosses then stronger gear might help too. Like Olena said, people won't give something for nothing."

"But here?" Ishita said, looking around.

Tanya felt emotion pull at her heart. "Yes," she said. The idea of leaving the shop felt like a huge weight in her stomach. She could hear the defensiveness in her voice.

"Is fixer-upper!" Olena said brightly. "Needs charm. Some paint. Less… evil slime."

She crouched and poked at a bit of smouldering floor with a fragment of a plank from beside her. "Hmm. Yes. That part probably cursed."

Tanya sat down heavily on the counter. "What the hell is today… We kill a Mini Boss, have acid corpses scattered through the shop, and now apparently I'm starting a business again."

Olena leaned in, eyes wide. "Exactly. Is perfect time. No competition. Very little regulation. Just don't explode or summon wrong thing."

Tanya blinked at her. "That's your business advice?"

"Yes. Oh, and branding. You need cool name. Something edgy, like 'Ashes & Needles.' Or 'Tat You Like It.'" She frowned. "No. That last one is bad. Forget that one."

Tanya groaned and rested her head on one hand. "I'm living in a fever dream."

"How do we know we can trust you?" Mrs Eceer asked, straightening as her stance became more defensive.

Olena turned to Tanya. "I like this one. She very stubborn. You will need to bribe her with compliments and shiny things."

Tanya raised an eyebrow. "I'm not bribing anyone."

"You will," Olena said, smile sly. "All leaders bribe. Is how empires built." She paused. "And destroyed. But mostly built."

Tanya just stared at her. A plank creaked under Olena's feet as she rocked from side to side. Something somewhere dripped.

"So what you think?" Olena asked.

Tanya exhaled and interlocked her fingers.

Olena seemed to notice her hesitation. Her bouncing slowed. Then, almost imperceptibly, her posture changed—still casual, but… steadier.

"Okay," she said, hands on hips. "Let's talk shop. Real shop."

Everyone blinked at her. She took a slow step forward.

"Listen. This place? Yes, is war zone. But bones are good. Strong frame. Thick outer wall. Is like big turtle. Ugly, but hard to kill."

Tanya snorted.

Olena pointed at the half-shattered window frames. "We patch these. Metal from signs, doors, shutters. Doesn't have to be pretty. Just strong. Hinged from inside, so you can lock down fast."

She spun and pointed toward the counter. "Here? Reception area and barricade. Dual purpose. Very efficient. Why not be comfy when keeping watch hm? Also I assume a flat is yours, yes?" She gestured around and upwards.

"Uh, yeah," Tanya said, pointing. "Staircase is out an' to the right."

Olena walked over to the wall and knocked. "Knock through wall to make doorway and block outside door."

Tanya looked at the wall, trying to imagine a door there. She glanced back to the others. Ishita was nodding, and Fahad rocked on his heels, expression clear delight.

Mrs. Eceer squinted. "That… makes sense."

"Of course it does," Olena said. "Now, lighting. You don't want gloom—is bad for customer experience and accuracy. We rig up some low-voltage strips, scavenged batteries." She paused to think. "Hm, must be better option but I not know. Solar panel would be good—could wire through old fuse box. Simple circuit."

Tanya stared at her. "You know electrics?"

Olena shrugged. "Enough not to die. Usually."

She walked over to the far wall and tapped on it thoughtfully. "This side murals. Big, bold—lets people know this place is more than ruin. I spot traps. Can hide them in design. Leave space for extra door too in case want expansion."

For the first time, Mrs Eceer looked impressed. "How did you see my traps?"

"Can see circuits in vision. Yours built like real wires. I barter with you next." She clicked and focused again, pacing in a circle and leaning into the kitchen. She wrinkled her nose at the smell, holding it with her fingertips. The group made eye contact and then one by one followed her, as if by looking where she was they could see what she was imagining. "Many options here. Store supplies? Bunker?" she said, nasally as her fingers were still clamped on her nose.

She turned back round and Mrs Eceer staggered backwards, she was right in her face from leaning over. Olena didn't bat an eye. "Scavenge for materials. Many materials needed. How good it become depend on that. I know two junkers who owe me favour. Boris can carry. I talk to ex-mechanic named Gert—has hand like wrench, heart like potato. Very reliable. Can weld."

"Woah." Fahad blinked. "You have a crew?"

Olena spread her arms. "I am woman of resources!"

Tanya watched her—really watched her. There was no joking in her eyes now—just clear, matter-of-fact determination. It was… weirdly comforting.

Olena turned to her again. "You love this place, yes?"

Tanya nodded, slowly.

"Then we make it fortress and temple. Safe and sacred. Trade hub, rest stop, maybe clinic, maybe magic lab. Maybe even small corner for noodle bar. Who knows?"

That part got a grin out of Tanya, despite herself.

"But," Olena said, stepping back, "I do nothing without your say. You are boss lady. I just help make dream happen. You say no, I walk."

There was a long pause.

Tanya looked at the melted planks, the stained ceiling, the broken counter she was still leaning on.

Then at her friends—scared, tired, but still here.

And finally, back at Olena. Who stood there quietly. Patient.

"…Alright," Tanya said.

Olena's face split into a smile so bright it could've powered a generator. "Is good day! I get paper! And pickaxe!"

She turned to study the wall, already muttering logistics under her breath. "…Electricity needs sorting… Boris hate loud bangs… no explosives near dog…"

Mrs Eceer raised an eyebrow at Tanya. "You sure about this?"

"No," Tanya said. "But she's the first person I've met since this started who made the end of the world not sound like… the end of the world."

Mrs Eceer nodded slowly.

Olena wandered around more. She pulled out a tape measure from one of her many pockets and began sizing things up.

Ishita settled back into the chair and Fahad snuggled next to her, slipping off every time he moved a muscle. He pulled some paper out and both him and Assistant took turns with a stubby pencil. Tanya looked forward to seeing what they were up to, but for now, she couldn't take her eyes off Olena. Mrs Eceer seemed to feel the same, although her stance was more guard-like, watching for funny business.

Olena stretched over the Mini Boss corpse to get further into the kitchen and tripped. Her foot squenched down into the monster and she swung it forward to steady herself. It hit the orb and she yelped, bouncing up and down. The orb had barely moved, but her foot hitting it had pushed some of the sludge off it.

"O kurwa…" Olena said in awe. She shook her head, like checking she wasn't dreaming. "Donnerwetter!" she exclaimed. Tanya could have sworn those were two different languages. Olena swung around, pointing to the orb. "You have monster core and you didn't tell me?!"

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