Dear Diary,

"Redemption isn't painless, Nor is it given for free, But it can always be earned." Tabitha Diaz, Doctrine of Tabitha, Book of Redemption

The third Verse of the Book of Redemption clarifies Tabitha's stance on who is deserving of Redemption. She opens by noting that Redemption will not be a 'painless process'. By this she is referencing the work one must do to be Redeemed, especially someone who has caused severe consequences for others via their actions. She notes that it is not 'given for free', meaning that it must be earned, worked for. In the last verse she even noted the cost of Redemption, at least the first and core cost; cleaning up the messes made by earlier actions. Finally, she makes it clear that no matter our previous actions, even the worst of us can earn Redemption. Obviously the worse our transgressions, the more harmful consequences we have inflicted on others, the more we must do to earn that Redemption, that second chance, but our Goddess, in her wisdom and mercy, would offer that to anyone, even those who would spurn her kindness. - Priestess Most High Above All Others, Archmage Imperator Saffron Aetos-Diaz, Commentary on the Doctrine of Tabitha

I think I did a good job on this one. Saffron still clarified and expanded on what I meant, but it's just that; expansion and maybe clarification, not really 'explanation'. I don't think the Verse needs all that much explanation.

Of course, she also took the opportunity to talk me up, which makes me feel good after the Commentary yesterday. I mean, she kinda distracted me and convinced me that she wasn't actually upset with me, but reading that even before I'd asked her about it, she still sat firmly on Team Tabitha is nice to hear.

That comment yesterday about 'not her Goddess' scared me for a minute, not gonna lie, but when she made it clear that she meant it like 'not just her Goddess'. Although I'd be fine with 'not just her Goddess', too, and I'm pretty sure she means that as well. But I guess knowing that she's cool with other people Worshipping me and me returning that, I dunno, it's not exactly Worship, but I care about them. It's not exactly family either, although that's closer, maybe.

I guess what I'm doing doesn't quite have an equivalent that I can draw on. It's bits and pieces of other things, implemented as best as I can. Yeah, I see into their heads and grant them their intimate desires. But I also have this urge to care for them and protect them. On top of all that, I definitely get an absolute mental and physical high from Worship, which if it's addictive it's addictive in the same sense really good food can be. The way Loki tells me Worship is the real Food of the Gods makes me think that even thinking about it as 'addictive' is maybe a stupid mistake. Like, I get that overeating can be an addiction, but a 'food addiction' is like a 'water addiction' or 'air addiction'. Does not compute.

You might have discerned the core of it though, Daughter.

Huh?

The Gods of the Pact, not to mention Gods influenced by them, whether directly or not, are absolutely gluttonous in their desire for Worship. There is no line they would not cross, no price to others they would not pay, in order to get just a little more than they got the day before.

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Oh, yeah. That definitely sounds like fuckin' addict behavior. Full on junkie in need of a fix.

It's an important thing to remember, especially in conjunction with your belief in Redemption.

I know I said this before, but huh?

Diana.

Suddenly his point became crystal clear. Oh, oh, shit. You mean I gotta keep an eye on her, like you do with a junkie who might relapse?

Exactly. Although in addition, when dealing with the other members of the Pact, especially those pulled into it unwillingly by their Patriarchs, remember they are addicts. Their behavior might well be affected by that.

I hadn't thought of that, either. Which made me feel a little guilty about The Morrigan and even just a little about Apollo. You mean I shouldn't off them if they're killing people?

Oh, if they refuse to stop when you tell them so, they've more than earned their execution. But should they pause, should they recoil, you may wish to stay your hand.

I thought about that. Realized he was right, and I wouldn't have thought of that on my own. Thanks, Dad. You're the best.

I know.

So everybody was pretty subdued at dinner yesterday. I think it's the rain. It got hot for a while, but lately it's just been raining buckets. Which isn't such a huge problem for me any more, since I'm not having to run laps or military campaigns or anything else where I go outside. But the kids were kinda bummed when I kept them inside. We spent some time with the Nightmares and Baby, but I could tell they wanted to go outside.

So when we got to the Bath, I definitely made use of the fact that it's basically a heated indoor swimming pool. Battle against Mama Kaiju again, which the kids still love. I kinda worry they'll outgrow it at some point, but for now I'm just gonna enjoy it while it lasts.

Dreamt of my ladies kinda lazily drifting around the Maw, like moms at a beachfront public swimming pool while the kids are off playing mini golf on the boardwalk. Which I know, doesn't make any sense, but it's what I thought at the time. Also, somebody kept, I dunno, whispering for me. Calling to me, maybe? None of my ladies, because they were all right there in front of me. Really weird.

Woke up, got Marie and myself to the Academy, Siobhan to the water closet after a very brief visit to the Infirmary just so she could see that I hadn't burned it down in her absence, then got Saffron to the Grand Council Chamber and our office in the Academy suite. Took Tallulah down to the Overlord's Keep and the kids outside for a while. Had to run inside when the rain hit, but wound up taking the Nightmares out for a walk afterward. Of course the girls had them splash through the puddles. They did not like it when I made them comb all the mud out of the poor Nightmares' manes before they got to go play afterward. No mutiny or anything, but I think they'd hoped I'd miss it or forget.

When I got Saffron back in her upright and locked position for her afternoon of coding, I asked, "so, how's the adjustment to Inspect coming along?"

She sighed. "I should be done tomorrow."

"Not complaining, but what happened to three days?"

I felt her smile crinkle her ears when she answered, "someone keeps interrupting me."

"Hey, I thought you liked our new lunchtime routine!"

She wriggled a little, totally erasing any further argument from me, before saying, "I do. I was mostly talking about the non-lunchtime antics. I'm also not complaining. It will be done when it is done."

"Whoa. Getting all Zen now, Kitten?"

She sighed. "I think I've had to, mostly because of Marie and Siobhan."

That tensed me up a little, and I remembered something. "And the situation with the Marshall?"

She paused her coding. "You know, that hadn't entered my mind as a worry. Which bothers me for no reason I can think of."

"Think we ought to send Karen?"

She hummed for a bit, then nodded. "As soon as the Seeking Tentacle returns, we'll send her out."

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