Dear Diary,

Y'know, I remember all those nasty threats I made to the Fates at one point. Now I'm not sure what to think. Maybe karma really is a thing and the scales balance out eventually. Maybe my frankly ridiculous threats of over the top violence reached their ears and now they're cowering in fear of my retribution. Maybe instead they heard me talking about their deep and abiding love of crack cocaine and LSD and decided to straighten up, fly right, go to rehab, get some therapy, and do their fuckin' job right for once.

Or maybe after spending over two months and a not insubstantial amount of a nation's resources tracking her down, we finally got a solid lead on Adrienne Crow.

So yesterday afternoon, as I wrapped things up in preparation for heading to the New Moon Revel, which included my Kitten indulging in Infinite Pieworks between my Maid Uniform clad thighs, Karen contacted us, thinking, Goddess? Imperator? Overlord? I think you want to hear this.

We're listening, replied Saffron, while not giving me the slightest respite to let me concentrate. Fortunately Karen's vision and hearing were not obscured in the slightest by my closed eyes or the faint wet noises from under my skirt.

Karen sat at what had to be the sorriest excuse for a bar I'd seen in a long time. It looked like what would happen if someone told the Disney Imagineers to create a Shrek's swamp themed bar, then some redneck visited, thought, "I could do that!" Then half assed everything, up to and including using mismatched random containers to hold the booze in. The bar itself wasn't horrible at first glance. One half of a two foot thick log split lengthwise, the flat surface polished by age and use, but the bottom dripped faintly with decay where the bark hadn't been removed or preserved. Two other logs held it up, and both of them had the same faintly phosphorescent green mold growing over them.

Everything smelled faintly of decay with the exception of the grain alcohol vapors wafting from the wooden cup in Karen's hand. She nodded to the androgynous old supposed person behind the bar, lifted the cup to her mouth, forced herself not to wince as the liquid burned her lips as she pretended to sip, then said, "say that again, please?"

The old being snorted, then topped off the cup with some kind of syrup as Karen slid a gold coin across the bar. "You won't find Jack anywhere outside his hidden halls these days. That red-haired... Lady has his full attention these days."

"Red haired?" Karen sipped a tiny amount of the syrup. Some kind of thick liquor, mixing coffee and maybe rum, with the tiniest bit of pure grain alcohol slipping in as well. "Is she Sidhe?"

The barkeep hissed. "Keep a civil tongue! No need to call their attention here?"

Karen swayed, the motion pure theater. "Forgive me. This is stronger than I'm used to. I must be stuttering and slurring. Do you know anything about the redhead? A name, an origin, anything?"

The old... person just seethed. "No. You'll be going now, though. I've no need for that kind of trouble here at my place!"

Karen nodded. "Of course. My apologies. A simple question before you go, though. Where can a weary traveler get a decent meal hereabouts? Perhaps a bed that doesn't sway in the current?" As she spoke, she lay down another coin and slid it across the counter. The hag disappeared it as Karen lifted the cup and shot it's contents back, then set it back down as she tried not to gag, choke, or otherwise lose control of herself.

The bartender grinned an awful grin as Karen did that, but just cackled and said, "if you can keep a civil tongue in your head and don't look too close in the stewpot, Old Johnny's puts out a good spread. Near half a mile due west of here. Now, out with you!"

Karen focused on staying upright, slipped another couple coins on the bar, maybe not remembering she'd already done so, and slurred out, "for your trouble," before staggering out of the bar.

She staggered up to a small skiff, where a dude in overalls and not much else stood with a long pole. "Did I hear you say you wanted to go to Old Johnny's, Miss?"

"No thank you. Back to the ship, please." She dropped onto the one seat in the skiff, and the boatman shoved off, poling his way through the swamp. Advice, please?

What do you think, Kitten? Sounds like that might be our missing Crow.

It does indeed. Just a moment, ladies. I lost a minute, my eyes focusing to see Saffron grinning into them. "So, would you like to take me out on a date on Wotansday?"

"Uh, sure. Why Wednesday?"

"Because I'll need Tyrsday to arrange things so I need not focus on the Grand Council then."

Stolen content alert: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences.

"Okay, sounds like a plan."

We'll arrive on the Questing Tentacle incognito on Wotonsday, Karen. Have transport ready for the three of us then.

Before Karen could reply, Tallulah cut in. May I join you?

Saffron looked at me, one eyebrow going up. "She misses her daughter, Kitten." She pouted just a little. I knew how she felt, but... "Imagine if it were Isnomi, and you hadn't seen her in a decade." She sighed and nodded. Sure, T. We'll see you there then?

I look forward to it.

Saffron sighed from her spot on my lap. "What's wrong, Kitten?"

"Not looking forward to our date being a double."

I blinked. "Karen and Tallulah? What?"

She just smiled at me. "Still my Goof. No, love. I meant sharing you with the Overlord."

I shook my head. "Oh, c'mon. Don't tell me you're jealous? You of all people? Weren't you the one making a whole assed plan for me to impregnate her?"

She snorted. "That, my love, was sexy with a side of political maneuvering. This, on the other hand, was an opportunity to sneak in a date with my wife."

I nodded. sent Tallulah a surreptitious image with a bit of pleading attached, and snuggled my Kitten to me. "You know you could have said something, right?"

She sighed. "I could have. But you're right. It's been a decade since she saw her daughter. I'm relieved each time I return home to find ours all just the tiniest bit closer to womanhood."

"Do you miss it? I'm sure we could get you some time off."

She smiled and shook her head. "Oh, no, love. I do enjoy every moment spent with our girls, perhaps especially our little Menace, but I know myself. Were I to spend every waking moment with them, I'd go mad."

I smirked at her. "You realize I spend most every waking moment with one of me with them, right?"

She flopped her butt down on my knees, then shrugged expansively, filling my face with coherence destroying cleavage. "Yes, but you're already mad. It's like an inoculation against child induced madness."

I threated my fingers through her pony tail, forced her around so I could stare into her eyes, and said, "I'm gonna force feed every moment of tonight's New Moon Revel into your brain hole just for that."

She smiled that ever so rare dazzling smile of hers, then put on her best fake pious look and said, "I quote the Holy Words of my Goddess unto you when I say, 'don't threaten me with a good time'."

So she wound up having to go to work this morning utterly without sleep, not to mention maybe the tiniest bit chafed and sore. First Andre and Andrea, twins who came to me then for me together on my Altar. Not something I ever expected, and where I kind of thought I'd be a little squicked, they'd apparently shared everything since the womb, almost like a single Soul spread across two bodies. Strange, but given some of my impulses I'm not gonna judge. Okay, I might get a little testy about having to pay such close attention to timing things perfectly with my Kitten's laughter ringing in my brain. Yasmin, whose old bones hurt so much she wanted anything that could make them stop. Massage and acupuncture with my very own personal kit, followed by the happiest of endings. Not permanent, but I could tell she might not last too much longer; I whispered to Dana, who had been managing the queue, to have Ora contact me when she passed. Lois, who wanted everyone in the Temple to watch how long she lasted, I sang her shame away when she passed out quicker than anyone yet in New Amsterdam, filling her deep well of desire with dreams of endless repetitions she couldn't tell from the real thing. Luis, her half brother, who wanted that same treatment so many others had gotten, and lasted far longer. Wound up shuddering to stillness over my shoulder as he left a tripping hazard in front of the altar.

Last of the night Rowan, who wanted, needed, could not cope with anything being less than just so, who stopped to clean up the mess before stepping up to the altar. For him I embodied exactly what he wanted in that deep corner of his mind, leaning on my Shapeshifting, my Blend, until something clicked and he collapsed like a puppet with its strings cut. A happy, satiated puppet I laid carefully on my Altar.

Before they carried him away, I quietly asked Dana, "there seem to be quite a few more Clergy here than anywhere else. Are there maybe fewer temple volunteers?"

They smiled, shaking their head. "No, Goddess. But they come to this Temple from smaller shrines throughout New Amsterdam, and..."

I smiled and embraced them. "Go on. I'm dumb sometimes. What am I missing?"

"More than half of the people in the Alliance live in New Amsterdam."

That hit me weird, but just right somehow. "Oh. Okay, yeah, that makes sense. May I kiss you?"

"I would like that very much, Goddess." So I did. Nothing even sexual about it, just a gesture of thanks and intimate caring. Then I turned and strode down to my waiting Clergy and temple volunteers. I wasn't certain where one group ended and the other started, because some of the Clergy's Glowing Midnight reproductions weren't the best, and I suspected some of the volunteers' outfits were their attempts to fit in with the Clergy proper. Not that it mattered. These were the people taking care of my congregation one way or another. I gathered as many as I could into my arms, the rest in my tentacles. "As many nights, as many Revels as it takes. I can't wait to know you all."

Then, with the taste of that Worship still filling my brain, I stepped back to the Bedroom and lifted my poor, sweaty, exhausted Kitten from the bed and kissed her, my tongue darting between her lips to taste her, to fill her with the strength of that Worship. Then did it again. Then again. When I pulled away, her eyes were a little glazed. "So. Should I tell the Grand Council you'll be away today?"

"No," she groaned out, insistent. "Just... please wash me down? I'm afraid my own sweat isn't as appealing as yours."

"Agree to disagree." But I scrubbed her down in the shower anyhow, then dressed her in Glowing Midnight. "Need a pick me up before you start your day?"

"Please."

I took her face in my hands, turned her to look up at me, and as her eyes fluttered closed, her mouth slipping open, I tagged her twice between the legs, inside and out, with enough Stabilizing Mana to make her eyes light up.

I've said it again, my inner moppet is Tomoko, and she's completely suborned my inner gremlin to her cause. Or maybe it's the other way around.

I mean, I'm gonna die on Ledger Clearing Day, but fuck it. Worth.

If you find any errors ( broken links, non-standard content, etc.. ), Please let us know < report chapter > so we can fix it as soon as possible.