This Human Immortal Is Too Serious

Chapter 149 The Saintess's Invitation


Inside the warm pavilion.

Wu Wang had set up several layers of barriers, and Fairy Ling had added another two at his request.

The Grand Elder, sensing the situation, quietly reinforced their efforts with a layer of Transcendent Realm Dao rhythm, completely preventing any outsiders from peering in.

"The Sect Master and the Saintess..." the Grand Elder muttered to himself, then chuckled self-deprecatingly. He paced with his hands behind his back at the cliff's edge. He certainly wouldn't stoop to spying on the romantic affairs of young people. A respectable figure of the Demon Path like him, who would bother watching such things? He was far too experienced for that.

Inside the room, Wu Wang quickly made his preparations.

He sat in a wooden chair, leaned back, and conjured a sphere of ice-cold water that hovered above his head. Then, he swiftly removed his robe and tossed it aside.

A lone man and woman in a room, disrobing, long hair flowing...

Ling Xiaolan was rather flustered. She immediately turned to face the corner, her words becoming jumbled and nonsensical.

"What are you doing? Although I am quite fond of you, Brother Wuwang, we are not Dao companions, nor are we married... This... this sort of thing... it's a breach of etiquette, detrimental to public morals, and rather improper... If you have feelings for me, you should say so openly. Make some promises, express your intentions, take an oath. That wouldn't be... wouldn't be unac..."

"Fairy, hey, look here."

"Hm?"

Hearing Wu Wang call her, Ling Xiaolan frowned slightly. She produced a bronze mirror, placing it before herself so she could observe Wu Wang indirectly.

That, she reasoned, still counted as not looking at him directly.

Wu Wang sat down with utmost seriousness and said via voice transmission, "Fairy Ling, this is my most important secret, and also the greatest agony of my life. Apart from Suqing, you are the woman I've had the most contact with. Our friendship is profound, and we trust each other deeply. Today, I will tell you about this matter. You see, I must constantly maintain a layer of protection on my body."

As he spoke, tiny lights appeared around Wu Wang. Two extremely thin layers of Ice Armor, enclosing a layer of clear water, separated from his body and dispersed, instantly evaporating into steam.

"This is a minor spell I developed, called the 'Ice Crystal Film.' The bottom layer of Ice Crystals doesn't deform. If someone touches it, the water layer absorbs the impact, preventing me from feeling any direct contact."

Having said this, Wu Wang couldn't help but look up and sigh. "Actually, I have a strange illness."

Ling Xiaolan couldn't help but turn back. Seeing Wu Wang's dejected expression, a peculiar feeling stirred in her heart. She asked softly, "What's wrong?"

"Heh," Wu Wang chuckled bitterly, then gestured for Ling Xiaolan to come closer. "Fairy, could you touch my arm with your finger?"

"This?"

Ling Xiaolan was puzzled, but trusting Wu Wang, she lightly tapped her toes and floated to his side.

She lifted her ethereal sleeve with a slender hand, revealing graceful fingertips tinged with rosy red.

Just as she was about to touch Wu Wang's arm, she asked again, "Like this?"

Wu Wang was about to respond when he suddenly felt a light touch on his arm.

It was the faintest of touches, a mere point of contact from her fingertip. The young woman's delicate fingers and his increasingly firm arm had a fleeting, perfect encounter on what seemed like an ordinary afternoon...

A sense of contentment washed over him.

Then, Wu Wang's vision went black, and he slumped backward.

The water sphere hovering above his head, no longer sustained by his Divine Thought, splashed downward, threatening to drench and awaken him.

At that very moment!

The slender hand that had touched Wu Wang moved slightly!

Ling Xiaolan reacted with lightning speed. With a push and a pull, she guided the falling water, which coalesced into a water serpent. She diverted it aside, where it dissipated into a cloud of mist that drifted out the window.

Not a single drop landed on Wu Wang!

The room was quiet for a long moment.

"Hm?"

Ling Xiaolan tilted her head, looking at Wu Wang, who had slumped over and fallen asleep in the chair. Question marks seemed to pop up above her head.

"Brother Wuwang, what were you trying to say?"

Wu Wang was snoring comfortably.

Ling Xiaolan blinked, suddenly realizing she might have done something wrong.

"Brother Wuwang... Brother Wuwang?"

She instinctively reached out to nudge him, but as her fingers neared his shoulder, she recoiled as if she had touched fire.

The way he had spoken, his expression, and that close-fitting Ice Crystal Film...

Could it be?

Brother Wuwang, don't tell me you also feel this world is full of filth, just like I do?

For a moment, Ling Xiaolan actually felt a little pleased.

She clasped her hands behind her back, gazing at Wu Wang's figure until the necklace on his chest flickered with a faint red light.

Cang Xue's voice sounded in Ling Xiaolan's ear, "He just wanted to tell you that he currently cannot touch women. If he comes into contact with a woman, he faints immediately."

Ling Xiaolan was slightly startled. She subconsciously took a few steps back, her Immortal Consciousness spreading out a hundred yards, her Short Sword already in hand.

Cang Xue's voice came again, "I am Wu Wangzi's birth mother, the wife of Xiong Han, chief of the Bear Hug Clan. Xiaolan, you don't need to be nervous."

"Auntie? You are here?"

Ling Xiaolan, however, grew truly nervous at this moment.

The necklace on Wu Wang's chest floated forward slightly.

"Don't be afraid. I'm just using this treasure to speak with you. Hold this necklace and look inward at your God's Mansion's Spirit Platform. I have a few things to tell you."

Cang Xue's voice was very gentle, possessing an indescribable charm.

Ling Xiaolan hesitated, considering it carefully. After a moment's delay, she finally took hold of the necklace in front of Wu Wang and looked inward at her God's Mansion.

The woman in an elegant long dress, who seemed to walk out of the starry sky, made Ling Xiaolan inexplicably tense...

「A moment later.」

"Auntie, rest assured. For Brother Wuwang's sake, I won't let him see through anything," Ling Xiaolan said, her expression complicated as she looked at Wu Wang. The necklace on his chest had returned to its place, showing no further abnormalities.

She pursed her thin lips, took out a jade hairpin, and walked over to Wu Wang. Looking at his sleeping profile, she carefully pricked him with it.

"Hm?"

Awakened by the pain, Wu Wang glanced around alertly.

"You're awake?" Ling Xiaolan asked quietly.

"Ah... do you understand now?" Wu Wang sighed, reapplied a layer of the Ice Crystal Film all over his body, and pulled his robe back on.

He said, "There's absolutely no cure for this strange illness of mine. As long as a woman makes any substantial contact, and I feel that touch, I'll faint instantly. I call it 'Gynotactual Narcolepsy.'"

"That..."

Ling Xiaolan nodded slightly, her eyes filled with pity. She said softly, "It's indeed quite tragic. That Innate God who cursed you is thoroughly wicked."

"Right? Exactly! I always said that guy was a scoundrel... Huh?"

Wu Wang looked up, staring at Ling Xiaolan, and immediately fired off a series of questions, "How did you know about this? How long was I asleep? And why am I not wet?"

The necklace on Wu Wang's chest bobbed up. A bit of starlight bloomed from within it, condensing into a finger that gently tapped Ling Xiaolan's forehead.

Ling Xiaolan couldn't help but press a hand to her forehead, her pretty face a mask of consternation.

Her mind had been in such turmoil that she had unwittingly revealed a flaw.

"This?"

Wu Wang looked at Ling Xiaolan, then lowered his head to grasp the necklace, puzzled. "How did you two start chatting? What did my mother say?"

"She didn't say much."

Ling Xiaolan suppressed her chaotic thoughts. Her right eye blinked gently, a surprisingly sly glint within it.

She smiled and said, "How can you recklessly inquire about words spoken between women, Brother Wuwang? You should rest for now. I'm aware of your predicament. In the future, if any woman tries to touch you, I'll definitely keep her away. No wonder you always say things like, 'Just holding a woman's hand counts as a win,' and why you specifically had Suqing go to the military camp that time. If I'm by your side in the future, Brother Wuwang, you can trust me too."

Wu Wang looked at Ling Xiaolan, deeply moved.

He truly hadn't chosen the wrong friend.

"Well, I'll head back first." Ling Xiaolan clasped her hands behind her back, retreated a few steps, and turned to leave. But just before exiting, she glanced back at Wu Wang, her eyes crinkling with a smile, her cheeks slightly flushed, and whispered, "Your mother is very beautiful."

Wu Wang replied seriously, "Well, your uncle is quite handsome too."

"You!"

Ling Xiaolan lowered her head and drifted out of the courtyard. Immortal Light bloomed beneath her feet, and in an instant, she vanished.

Sitting in his chair, Wu Wang suddenly felt... exceptionally passive.

He grasped the necklace and called out for his mother for a long time before she finally responded.

But no matter how Wu Wang cajoled or pleaded, Cang Xue refused to tell him what she and Ling Xiaolan had discussed.

"Rest assured," Cang Xue said gently. "Mother knows what you're worried about. Ling Xiaolan has no connection to the gods; she's merely a human race woman with outstanding talent. I sought her out to impart a Divine Skill to her."

"What kind of Divine Skill?"

"It's definitely not one of those shameless dual cultivation techniques from the Human Domain."

Cang Xue huffed lightly, then suddenly said, "The Heaven Palace has recently sent several Divine Spirits into the Northern Wilderness. They seem to be investigating the Star God Cult. What do you think should be done?"

Wu Wang's attention was instantly diverted, and he began discussing with his mother matters crucial to the fate of the Northern Wilderness.

...

When Ling Xiaolan returned to her dwelling, her spiritual mind was inevitably in turmoil, making it difficult even to enter meditation.

Suddenly learning Wu Wang's secret, understanding the pressure he had been under, and then having an unexpected, rushed meeting with that profoundly mysterious "auntie" of his...

To calm her mind at this moment was indeed somewhat unrealistic.

She silently recited a calming mantra, trying to sort through things one by one, and couldn't help but recall her conversation with the esteemed Cang Xue.

Is the head of the Northern Wilderness's Sun Ritual already this formidable?

Ling Xiaolan had encountered many experts and seen numerous individuals with extraordinary auras. Sect Master Jingyue herself was one of the top powerhouses in the Human Domain.

But upon careful comparison, Ling Xiaolan still felt that the woman with the most transcendent aura she had ever met was this Cang Xue.

At that time, this "auntie" had manifested in her God's Mansion, arriving on a path of starlight, and had nodded to her in greeting.

Cang Xue's opening words were a little stiff.

Ling Xiaolan, too, was slightly nervous, but her speech and manner were graceful and appropriate.

Cang Xue informed Ling Xiaolan about Wu Wang's strange illness and its origin—a Divine Spell cast by an Innate God.

"This Divine Spell is one that very few gods can use. It constrains my son at the level of the Great Dao. This matter is quite complex. For now, just consider this Divine Spell to be a scheme by that Innate God, like an anchor cast upon my son."

"An anchor?"

"Yes, like a ship's anchor," Cang Xue explained patiently.

"Auntie, I know what an anchor is."

Ling Xiaolan's thoughts were still very clear. She asked in return, "Since it's inconvenient to elaborate, why are you telling me these things, Auntie?"

Cang Xue said softly, "Xiaolan, come here... I've been secretly observing you for more than a day."

"This?"

Ling Xiaolan's face flushed slightly, her heart fluttering with a hint of panic.

A light mist arose in her Primordial Spirit's God's Mansion, coalescing into a stone table and chairs. Cang Xue gently guided Ling Xiaolan's Primordial Spirit to sit.

Cang Xue sighed softly. "I know you're a kind-hearted child and a true friend to Ba'er..."

"Auntie, Brother Wuwang has saved my life several times."

Ling Xiaolan stated, "If you have something to entrust to me, Auntie, as long as it's for Brother Wuwang's good and doesn't harm the Human Domain, I'm willing to risk my life."

"Xiaolan, you are truly intelligent and have your own judgment."

Cang Xue said gently, "If my son is blessed with such a companion, I would be much more at ease."

"Auntie, you... This is a matter between Brother Wuwang and me. It's not appropriate for you to say such things..."

"My apologies, I misspoke."

Cang Xue didn't dwell on it and quickly returned to the main topic: Wu Wang's strange illness.

Ling Xiaolan listened for a while, only to realize this strange illness was almost incurable and had plagued him since he was seven or eight years old until this very day.

Cang Xue said, "Alas, Ba'er sometimes takes his responsibilities too seriously. The title of Young Master of the Bear Hug Clan was a burden we, his parents, placed upon him. He worries that this strange illness will affect the continuation of our lineage, potentially throwing the Bear Hug Clan into chaos centuries from now. That's why he came to the Human Domain to cultivate with such determination. Through a combination of fate and other designs, the Human Emperor of the Human Domain became a close acquaintance of his, but even the Human Emperor couldn't find a viable solution."

"Is this strange illness truly incurable?"

"There are solutions. One is for my son to marry the one who cast the spell. The other is for my son to reach the Transcendent Realm; if his own Dao gains the recognition of Heaven and Earth, becoming equal to the myriad Great Daos, the spell can be broken."

Ling Xiaolan breathed a sigh of relief. "Then that's good... Brother Wuwang will definitely be able to reach the Transcendent Realm!"

Cang Xue asked, "But can my son reach the Transcendent Realm within a hundred years?"

Ling Xiaolan immediately countered, "How can anyone reach the Transcendent Realm within a hundred years?"

"Exactly. So that path is not feasible."

Ling Xiaolan frowned and asked, "The Innate God who cast the curse might find him within a hundred years?"

"There's a possibility, though it's not yet a certainty... This matter is of great importance; do not reveal it to anyone. However, given the standing of your Xuan Nu Sect's Sect Master, she likely knows some of the inner details."

Cang Xue took Ling Xiaolan's small hand and said warmly, "My son trusts you, and I trust you. Our family does not consider you an outsider. In terms of talent, comprehension, and your foundation in cultivation, you are the only one who can help my son. I have a cultivation technique that can allow your Dao Realms to advance rapidly. With my help and the Human Emperor assisting him, it's not impossible to try for the Transcendent Realm within a hundred years."

Ling Xiaolan felt a surge of panic and quickly said, "This... a dual cultivation technique? Even the techniques of the Hehuan Sect don't claim to allow one to reach the Transcendent Realm within a hundred years."

"With his strange illness, how could he possibly engage in dual cultivation?"

A faint smile touched Cang Xue's lips as she lightly tapped the back of Ling Xiaolan's Primordial Spirit hand.

Strands of Immortal Light flowed into Ling Xiaolan's Primordial Spirit. The sudden influx of complex information made her feel somewhat dazed.

By the time she regained her senses, Cang Xue had already departed from her God's Mansion, leaving only a few parting words:

"Though called a cultivation technique, it's actually a Divine Art. You might not know the origin of the Xuan Nu Sect's core cultivation tenets; they are, in fact, from a similar source. Your practice of this art will thus be twice as effective with half the effort. I will not force you to become Dao companions or anything like that. Everything depends on fate and your own hearts. If you don't wish to cultivate this Divine Art to help him, then don't mention this to him. You can also pretend I was never here. Regardless, I thank you, and there will be a generous reward for you in the future..."

Divine Art, cultivation technique?

Ling Xiaolan looked inward at her God's Mansion again and could see a profound stele floating within.

Oh well, it's for Brother Wuwang's sake, to help him overcome this strange illness sooner.

A thread of her Immortal Consciousness probed into the profound stele. Ling Xiaolan quickly became engrossed, astounded by the profundity of the art.

...

「Three days later, in the early morning.」

Over a hundred tower ships and flying shuttles hovered above the steep mountain peak, presenting a rather spectacular sight from afar.

Banners bearing the character "Ren" (Benevolence) fluttered upon them.

On the largest ship, which resembled a floating celestial island, Wu Wang left the cabin where a group of Benevolent Emperor Pavilion experts were meditating. Humming a little tune, he skipped off to the 'VIP suite' on the top deck.

The Benevolent Emperor Pavilion's ships, while not as luxurious for enjoyment as the Annihilation Sect's own tower ships, were superior in their defensive formations.

In the 'VIP suite,' Lin Suqing and Immortal Mu were playfully wrestling to one side, the Grand Elder and Xiao Jian Daoist were engrossed in a game of chess, and two other Transcendent Realm experts were chatting idly in the adjacent cabin...

Wu Wang glanced toward the screen in the corner and his eyes met Ling Xiaolan's, who was peeking out from its edge. She immediately dodged back, a hint of panic in her eyes.

How strange.

Could it be that I said something wrong that day and made Fairy Ling misunderstand?

Wu Wang felt a little uneasy. He racked his brain but couldn't recall saying anything inappropriate. He had merely told Fairy Ling about his strange illness.

He had also taken the opportunity to verify if the strange illness had, by any chance, disappeared.

Heh, the result was just as he'd expected.

The only thing he couldn't be sure about was what his mother had said to Fairy Ling.

This thought stirred a bit of emotion in Wu Wang.

What was this all about? You guys don't know how to work as a team, so I have to teach you? My son doesn't know how to pursue a fairy, so his mother has to help him? Give me a break! Wasn't this just making things more chaotic? Could it be that neither his father-in-law-to-be nor his own mother were optimistic about his future with Little Jingwei?

Wu Wang sighed softly, sitting there lost in thought for a moment.

Cultivate. Only by becoming strong enough can I escape these parental arrangements and achieve true freedom in love...

"Brother Wuwang!"

Ling Xiaolan suddenly darted over from the side, looking at Wu Wang with an air of firm resolution.

Floating three inches above the ground, she seemed so sacred, so resolute at that moment.

She took a deep breath and said softly, "Would you be willing to try a dual cultivation technique with me?"

Wu Wang was petrified on the spot.

Lin Suqing's small hand trembled, tightening its grip on Immortal Mu's neck. Xiao Jian Daoist's hand faltered as he placed a chess piece, putting it in the wrong spot. The ever-loyal Grand Elder had already risen to his feet, saying, "Everyone, remain calm. There's no need to be alarmed. Follow me and let's give them some space. This way, please."

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