Chapter 22: Li Xianyu: I Have New Porn

Translator: Larbre Studio  Editor: Larbre Studio

Three days passed in the blink of an eye, and Li Xianyu met several members of the ancient demon descendants in the group. In addition to Lightning King, the others were not very reliable, no, Thunderbolt Battle Lady was very reliable, occasionally she would go with the flow but in fact, she was quite reliable and also not aloof. Li Xianyu looked at her space, and found that she was a tall, delicate beauty who had short hair.

The most improper figures were Lady Killer and Fingering Techniques Similar to Kato Eagle. The former was a handsome man, while the latter was an uncle with an untrimmed beard stubble.

And then there was Li Bai. This man’s unique characteristic was that he liked to recite poetry, and whenever he spoke, he recited a few poems. It was particularly tiring to chat with him, especially if he were to challenge others to a duel of poetry. He would recite a line from a poem, and then tag a specific person to continue the next sentence.

There were also Mo Fei and Li Shizhen. The former was said to be in charge of the world’s ancient demon descendants and all the demon descendants members in the company were named by her. Li Xianyu has not yet become a regular employee and does not have a title for the time being.

No wonder he thought the company’s demon descendants employee’s titles were of a very similar style. It turned out to have been from the same person.

The woman was a talented person at naming things.

Demon descendants members did not ask each other for their real names, unless they revealed it voluntarily, otherwise they are called by their code names.

Li Shizhen was one of the four divine doctors in the medical department and is unparalleled in acupuncture. It would be easy for him to cure Li Xianyu’s kidney deficiency. But ever since that day, he hadn’t been online, and Li Xianyu didn’t know what he was thinking. They were not familiar, so he couldn’t go to the company to find him.

Li Shizhen was also a code name and not a real name.

The most interesting person was King Kong. This guy had serious gynophobia and cannot accept any physical contact with women. Even if he were to shake hands with them, he would experience nausea and vomiting, as if, as if women were shit in his eyes?

The crucial point was that King Kong was not gay. If he was gay it would have been fine, there was always a way out. Men can have many paths, and they can be the path themselves at times.

But he was not interested in men, so he could only masturbate with his hands as companions.

So Li Bai was teasing King Kong that day, when Li Xianyu accidentally joined in. These days, he was hated by King Kong and often bickered with him, a newcomer in the group.

“Bian Que said that this kind of trauma is almost permanent and cannot be cured. King Kong has gathered almost all the countries’ porn these years.” When chatting in private, Lightning King said so.

Bian Que was one of the four divine doctors in the Medical Department.

I want to pay good money for his computer’s memory card. Li Xianyu went on the Internet to do a quick search and detected loopholes sharply, “Something is wrong, there are two cases of fear of women, one is social fear, the other is a phobia due to impotence. The former generally happens to otakus, and the latter happens to middle-aged men, what is the root of his problem?”

Otakus’ fear of women did not affect their sexual relationships, while middle-aged men lost to time, which was akin to a butchering knife. They didn’t even want women anymore, let alone watch porn.

Regarding this issue, Lightning King was not very clear and only said it was traumatic, but King Kong refused to reveal the cause of his gynophobia.

Li Xianyu got up at eight o’clock in the morning, went downstairs to buy breakfast, and picked up express delivery from the courier cabinet. Express delivery was Great-Grandma’s clothes and some snacks and daily necessities. Women’s clothes were too expensive to buy in shopping malls, thus Li Xianyu introduced Taobao. Although Taobao had inferior and counterfeit goods everywhere, it was cheap. Of course, he did not give Great-Grandma access to the Taobao account. If he had, he would have been screwed.

Then, there were his online shopping props to ward off evil spirits and prevent ghosts from appearing.

In addition, there were San Wu’s parcels, sent by the company.

Great-Grandma was still sleeping, her back to the door. Her slender legs were tangled in the bedding, and she was wearing short pajamas that ended at the top of her thighs. Her small buttocks were shapely and pert, but it was too small. Li Xianyu still liked buttocks that were ample like the full moon.

Lolis have not grown up, teenage girls were too shy, girls of the same age are not seductive enough. Elder women and big sisters are better.

Without interrupting her, he closed the door and turned to San Wu’s room, holding the express courier parcel in his hand, knocking at the door first, and then said, “San Wu, I’m coming in.”

San Wu sat on the bed obediently watching TV, her gaze focused and did not respond to Li Xianyu’s entry.

“Your express delivery.” Li Xianyu handed over the parcel.

San Wu opened the box and took out a gas mask. Her expressionless little face revealed a hint of relief.

“Gas mask?!” Li Xianyu seemed to have guessed something.

“Practice breathing!” San Wu said, as she put on the gas mask and sat on the bed.

What the hell, so this is how they do it…

San Wu thought and explained, “If you don’t wear a gas mask, you will be poisoned by haze when you practice breathing. After all, we live in Shanghai.”

A great dig.

Li Xianyu silently covered his face, “Does everyone have to wear this thing when they practice? Why didn’t I think of it?”

San Wu replied, “There are large air purifiers in the company’s ventilation system, and there is no need to worry about the haze in the company. Here, you can only buy this to practice breathing.”

Before him, he made up all kinds of ways to overcome the sad-dharma-vipralopa era, such as fantasy, fantasy-wuxia and even lame ways, but he did not expect it to be so scientific.

It turns out that just a gas mask or an air purifier was enough in the sad-dharma-vipralopa era.

Li Xianyu said in a bored tone, “You go on, I’ll go play my game.”

He had stayed up late last night to read up on a lot of information, regarding breathing practice, he was no longer an amateur. He at least knew a little common sense, that there was a saying: it takes ten years of work for water to penetrate a rock!

That is to say, regardless of genius or imbecile, if they wanted to master breathing cultivation, the threshold was ten years.

It meant that even if Li Xianyu was a very rare genius whom you would encounter once in a thousand years, he will have to practice for ten years before he can make a difference.

Ten years later, he would become an uncle. If he couldn’t flaunt his cool skills when he was young, what was the point of reiki cultivation?

Li Xianyu, who was used to the fast-paced life in Shanghai, has removed the road of practicing breathing techniques from his heart.

I can only rely on awakening. As long as I can awaken, I can control Great-Grandma and be invincible.

Ding! The message came from his mobile phone, from the “Ancient Demon” chat application.

Li Xianyu took out his mobile phone and scrolled through the chat of his demon descendants seniors.

King Kong was complaining that there were no new porn videos and he was bored of the old ones. He asked if there were any exciting Japanese porn videos in the group. Europe and the United States porn would also do.

But no one responded to him. There were a bunch of monsters and demon descendants members in the group, but they were rich and thus did not lack women. They might watch porn out of interest, but they definitely did not have a treasured collection.

King Kong: “Boring. I knew it, it’s no use asking all of you. Why isn’t Long Ao Tian awake yet, no one’s been calling him lately?”

Thunderbolt Battle Lady: “Do you dare to go? Fire Child is considered lucky and was rescued. But even so, he had a relapse a few days ago and is now tied up in the medical department, treated like a patient with serious mental illness.”

Lady Killer: “We are not scared of otakus’ imagination, but we are scared of otakus’ superpowers.”

Fingering Techniques Similar to Kato Eagle: “So I’ve said, it is better to move bricks than to be an otaku. San Wu is now with Li Xianyu, otherwise she can protect us, and we can try to wake Long Ao Tian.”

Li Bai: “Even if San Wu protects us, we will at most be safe, we still can’t wake Long Ao Tian up. You can never wake up a person who is pretending to sleep. Oh right, why is San Wu with an intern?”

Thunderbolt Battle Lady: “Lightning King says he’s a potential talent.”

Fingering Techniques Similar to Kato Eagle: “You believe him? He just said it casually. Why don’t we ask him straight? @Walking Pile Driver”

Li Xianyu was about to respond when an ID “Tong Tong” whom he did not know, asked, “Who is Li Xianyu?”

Li Bai sent a picture captioned: “Little Sister, let Big Brother bring you to see goldfish.”

Lady Killer sent a picture with the caption: “Do you want to know me?”

Fingering Techniques Similar to Kato Eagle sent a picture with the caption: “Earned big for 3 years, the death penalty is worth it!”

It was the picture of him flashing his penis again.

Li Xianyu: “What the f***.”

[Files Administrator] Mo Fei: “Don’t send this kind of picture in front of children, I will mute anyone who does it again. Tong Tong, that man is Li Xianyu.”

Mo Fei removed the photos sent.

Tong Tong: “Why did we add such a scary person to the group?”

Seeing this, Li Xianyu felt bitter and sad. He had just entered the group, and his reputation was ruined.

[Files Administrator] Mo Fei: “Tong Tong, have you finished filming your drama?”

Tong Tong: “Mmhmm, shooting just wrapped up for me. I have to return to class in Shanghai tomorrow, my mother said that I cannot neglect too much homework.”

She sent several pictures of the crew to the group, together with celebrities who were donned in period drama costumes. There was an adorable loli with big eyes and long hair in every photo, who looked cute and kawaii.

The loli should be Tong Tong.

Fingering Techniques Similar to Kato Eagle: “Why isn’t there a photo with Qin Bao Bao? She isn’t filming a new drama?”

Tong Tong: “Boss has long retired from the film industry and is taking care of children at home.”

Lady Killer: “I’m curious about who the child’s father is.”

The question was unanimously liked by everyone.

[Medical Department Vice Team Leader] Li Shizhen: “Tong Tong, is your father’s lumbar disc protrusion better?”

Tong Tong: “Thank you Grandpa, he’s better.”

Walking Pile Driver: “Leader Li Shizhen, you’re finally here, let’s set a time to meet.”

[Medical Department Vice Team Leader] Li Shizhen: “There’s no cure, farewell!”

King Kong: “Hahaha, boy, you’re worse than me. You still have the face to write a poem to laugh at me.”

Then, King Kong kept spamming Li Xianyu’s penis flashing photo, with many meme-like captions.

Walking Pile Driver: “Don’t do this Senior King Kong, I have new porn.”

King Kong really stopped. “What new porn? I’ve watched countless films, unless you bought it from Japan, or like Long Ao Tian can get through the Firewall to access foreign websites.”

System Notification: Walking Pile Driver has shared links.

Six Video Download Links:

[Seven topless minors bullying a scantily-dressed young woman]

[Heartless biological parents force young girl to sell herself to a spa center]

[Beautiful girl falls into the hands of a beast and is forced to cultivate feelings with it every day]

[Jumping through time, innocent high school girl fell in love with a dog and lived an unabashed sweet life]

[Family ethics: Brother imprisoned and humiliated his sister because he was not satisfied with her marriage, and hunted down his nephew]

[In the wild! Unconscious woman dragged into the depths of the dense forest by seven men]

King Kong: “Good man, have a great life.”

Lady Killer: “Good man, have a great life.”

Li Bai: “Good man, have a great life.”

Fingering Techniques Similar to Kato Eagle: “Good man, have a great life.”

System Notification: [Files Administrator] Mo Fei has muted “Walking Pile Driver” for a day.

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