The cloth covering my face like an Orc's underwear covering his nether region was on fire and the natural way of rescue was to remove it.

But if I removed it then everyone would see my face and they would get to know that I am the Hero king and if that happened, it won't take too long for Malthus to appear before me and clap my cheeks without any foreplay and oil.

So to avoid that, Jack gave me an idea.

To not make people recognize my face, he said I should abandon all my clothes and roam naked in the prison while finding the exit like a boyfriend finding the exit of his girlfriend's house.

Not only was this idea straight out of an unsold exhibitionism doujin but also made no sense.

To hide my identity, he was telling me to reveal everything. It's like burning your whole house just because you didn't see the spider on the same spot where you had seen it a few seconds ago.

His logic was that even if the guards saw my face they wouldn't believe I am the Hero King if they looked at my small meat USB.

Then I told Jack that my USB isn't small but the ghost said he had already seen it while I was asleep for three months inside the cell with him.

Which obviously didn't sit right with me..

"That's a violation of my privacy! You are not the creator of a messaging app to peek into my data like that and then swear that you didn't do it."

"But I am saying I did it. I am not denying. And you can't blame me. What can a man do with nothing to do?"

"So you looked inside my pants to cure your boredom? That's not how dopamine detox works!"

"Retort all you want, pal. But you have to do something. The cloth is on fire and don't forget you wiped petrol from the same cloth. So as you know, fire in petrol is the same as pregnancy at college—both spread really fast."

Shit.

I had forgotten about the petrol thing.

Why is this ghost making sense before I could? Must be the demand of plot. Otherwise, I refuse to believe he is smarter than me.

Nevertheless, I really gotta do something.

"That's the only way, pal."

"I am not stripping!"

"Then get burned."

Angh.

Fukc it.

I brought my hand to the knot of the cloth and pulled it.

The cloth came off like an oversize condom.

Now the burning guard that started this fire in me—Sorry. Let me rephrase that.

The burning guard who put me in fire in the first place had the cloth in his own hand now.

I let that go. He can have that.

But he was too close to me and I was bare chested as well.

Being bare chested wasn't too much of a problem as even women do that nowadays but my face was visible now.

Thankfully, the guards couldn't see it but in order to not get caught by fire again, I have to push this guard away the same way prostitutes do when a poor man approaches them. I wasn't even that poor, bitch.

Anyway, fortunately, I had just the thing for that.

I held Jack's dead body leg with my free right hand and raised it.

I would kick the guard using Jack and this way I would stay safe and run right away.

Yes. What a plan. I finally got my brains back. No more a ghost is smarter than me embarrassment.

Let's go.

The right raised leg of Jack moved towards the burning guard's chest with my help and the leg felt strange for some reason. Anyway, I just need it for a second…

I brought it towards the guard's chest and…

"Don't you dare do that, pal."

Motherfu—

"Why?!"

"Because that is my body. I don't want it to get burned more than it already is."

"That's a dead body, you Japanese censored porn!"

"Still. I have my vibes with it. Use your own shit to clean up your shit."

"What the hell does that even mean?!"

Jack sighed. "Use your leg to push him away. I don't want my leg to melt."

"Why the fuck will your leg melt? You weren't born in Madame Tussaud Museum for god's sake!"

"No. It will melt, pal."

"WHY?"

"Because it is made of plastic! My leg is prosthetic. I am a cripple for god's sake!"

"..."

"You are a what?"

"I am a cripple! A disable. A vegetable. A fucking spaghetti walker. You want to hear more before you get it?"

"... What the actual hell? Your one leg is local? And you bastard, if that's the case then what would even happen if it even caught fire? It's an artificial leg."

"Just because it's artificial doesn't mean I don't have real feelings for it. After I tried to jump on my landlord, her husband broke one of my legs and since then, it has been with me. I can't just see it getting burned. I am not a monster. Has humanity fallen so low that we don't care for things that helped us walk? Huh? Is this the dark age written in the scriptures? Is this the end of the World!? Answer me, pal. Is this the age of the monsters!?"

"... What the hell is wrong with you? Why do you suddenly become Nelson Mandela and Gandhi combined over a prosthetic leg? And this body won't even help you anymore. You are dead! A ghost! You don't need legs anymore. You can float, motherfucker!"

"I was inside that body while I was alive. I can't just see it getting destroyed. Do husbands let go of their wives after being inside them? No. They take care of them in hopes she would let them go inside again. That's the basic barter system. That's basic humanity!"

"... Did you just compare marriage life to your relationship with your dead body?"

"That's one way to put it. I just wanted to explain in a way that could be understood even by you."

"I don't care anymore. I am kicking this guard. You can't touch me anyway."

"No, pal. Please don't do it." Jack flailed his hands and suddenly his eyes lit up. "Wait… if you kick the guard using my leg then it will catch fire too and you will face problems carrying it. Only my chest is on fire right now. But if my leg caught fire, it will be closer to your body and you will get burned too."

I paused.

I registered his words and I hate to say but he made sense again.

But then, my eyes suddenly lit up.

"Then I can just remove your fake leg and use it as a weapon to push guards away. And when it is useless, I can just throw it away like a fetus in a minor. Yes."

I am a genius.

I ran my palm on Jack's right leg and found the joining point of the prosthetic.

Then I used some strength and…

"Don't you dare do that too, pal."

"Oh for fcuks sake! What is the problem with that now?"

"If you remove that leg..." Jack spoke, his voice turning solemn.

I frowned. Is it something serious?

Jack looked at me with his solemn brown eyes.

"If you remove that leg, pal. Then…"

The ghost's voice cracked but he finished his words.

"I won't be able to jerk off while standing!"

"..."

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